My Preschool Dropout

"But no one walks in my shoes, and I don’t walk in yours." I get the feeling that some of these comment-ers missed that line. I applaud you for doing what you believed to be the best option for yourself and your family. Such strong negative opinions quick to point out where and how another person went wrong is often one of the biggest reasons we compare ourselves to our neighbor.

With a baby AND a 3 year old, I'd say you're excelling at the mother hood situation as long as you still have all of your hair.....and can sit back and laugh when it's all said and done. I'm happy Dillon found a school that he loves and that works out for everyone & wish you all the best!

I dont know but it sounded like this Mom had alot of "meltdowns"

Wow, I think a lot of posters missed the point of the article, which was FOR MOMS TO STOP JUDGING EACHOTHER!!!!!!!!!!

I've been following the comments and appreciate (for the most part) the various points of view. :)

I respond to some of your comments at angiemizzell.com

I agree that you have to what is best for you family and there is no point in us always being so judgemental towards each other.

The only thing i keep thinking about is that your older son, who liked school and was enjoying it, and yet had to give it up becuase you could not figure out how to make it work. Seems to me there could have been a compromise in there so he could have still gone for a couple of days a week.

they need to be in school

Day Care is generally an expensive sitter. I know of women who put their kids in day care so they can play indoor tennis and meet for lunch with their girlfriends.

Yes they will learn some of the basics and pick up a few social skills but I think this is why we have such turmoiled family lives now......from someone else raising them during the day to planting them in front of the TV or computer until dinner is made and then back to the electronics for the remainder of the evening.

Good for you for trusting your instincts and doing what worked best for your whole family. In the end, you found solutions that worked for you, the baby, and your preschooler. Wonderful. Since becoming a mom, I have never felt so judged at times, not since at least the 5th or 6th grade, but somehow parenting triggers lots of people & the judging begins, doesn't it? It's such a sensitive topic. I myself am an older, SAHM without a lot of family around to help & a husband who travels. My son is very active, & to disrupt the nap routine we have is just asking for trouble. I know what I can handle & I know what works for us. I know that looks a whole lot different from my best girlfriend who is a mother of 5 children under the age of 10. We are all different & we have different kids & different life situations-it's important to remember that and not be judgmental.

Hey...Angie..it's me Catherine P...not sure why it posted under my mom's - lol!

Give me a break! What are you gonna do when your child has to go to kindergarten?

I see a lot of positive reactions to your blog, but I don't agree. Your baby will adjust to a new schedule. You have shown your oldest child that when things get tough to just give up because that is the "easy" thing to do. When he is older and math is hard are you going to tell him that's okay it's tough so don't do it? If you wrote looking for validation of what you did, you found it. What you did for your oldest is show him that when things get tough it's okay to give up and the baby's schedule is more important than he is.

There's nothing wrong with family members making sacrifices for each other. But it's bogus to expect the older children to get used to making sacrifices for the younger ones. It's just the beginning for this kid who was benefiting from preschool, and now has to stay home because the baby's and mommy's needs rule. Oh and since he's not a baby, he's old enough to handle it---just practice for more to come? The baby who entirely depends on you is priority, mom's schedule is a priority, and the older kid gets sloppy seconds. I thought being a stay at home parent is supposed to benefit the kid(s) you're parenting and staying home for. But even when a parent stays home, the kid(s) are a hostage to the parent's priorities and schedule. In this case, the kid is a hostage to the mom's and the baby's priorities?

Why not compromise by taking your child to preschool just a few times per week and let the baby adjust! You know, babies adjust just as well as older kids do. Letting your son see that in a family, everyone makes sacrifices so that each person can have benefits, is a good thing.

Thanks, Holly! I'm happy to report that compromise has been found! This essay was written many months ago.

I agree that it was a good idea to pull your son out of school. At the end of the day a happy and relaxed mom is the best thing for your kids and family.

And it is true that he will catch up later when he goes to school.

All the best and thanks for an article which ha made us realise that we dont have to do it all even when its killing us.

I am an elementary teacher. Here's my opinion, if anyone cares. Preschool is designed to get kids ready for real school. In kindergarten, kids now have to read and write. It's no longer learning colors and that stuff. So, as long as you are working with your drop out at home (teaching him colors, letters, and reading to him) he will be fine. Preschool is not mandatory. I myself dropped out of preschool, and now have a bachelor degree in education and working on another bachelor degree; oh, and I made Dean's List in college and was honor roll in high school. So, as long as you work with your child, no harm done.

Not all students are ready for school at 3, 4, or even 5. I believe that as a parent, you have a responsibility to listen to your children, including your baby.

Joy, the point was that every mother needs to make these decisions on her own and for her own family. Don't judge until you've lived her life. So a kid starts pre-school a little late. So what? Everyone will have different circumstances and those will require adaptation. This kid will get an extra year at home with mom, which may be even better. Live and let live.

yay... another mom who doesn't fall into that "my child needs formal education from birth" type of catergory. She recognized that it wasn't working out and fixed the problem. Not going to preschool can actually help some children; some kids just need to have a longer home (from family) learning experience.

As I read these comments ...I am seriously thinking this is a joke ...all the negativity...really people...really...I mean...I am not sure of the background of the one's making comments about Angie taking D out of preschool..I am assuming that the big judgers have many, many degrees in education and have been in the EXACT position as Angie and have had 2 boys EXACTLY like Angie's and KNOW everything going on her life to be able to say I have been there AND I know that what you did is wrong - ARE YOU KIDDING ME?????????? I would love to know the experience and the education backgrounds on the big judgers...so please do tell us how you can be so right that she was so wrong ..and the name calling...maybe these are just young, young mothers just out of highschool who are still into the name calling...I am not sure...but really? Would love to know!!!!! I know that when my Micah and C were born..yeah there are books out there..but I have to make my own book on them AND I am sooo thankful to not "follow" the crowd and I may not agree on what everyone does for their children BUT who am I???

i think that marie is a worthless loser who needs to go back to preschool ~ did you see all of her misspelled words? get a life, marie!

While the pre-school director didn't judge you or put you down (like you expected), had it ever occurred to you that maybe she wasn't patting you on the back either? Maybe she doesn't give a hoot one way or the other what you do with your kid. Maybe she just needs to get off the phone with you promptly so she can return to running her business. You sound slightly self-centered. And a paparazzi photo-shoot with your 3-year old as he heads off to pre-school? Puh-leeze. Maybe you need to pop the proverbial teat outta the mouth. Nobody cares.