Parenting Guru: Ear piercing and letting the boy become a man

I've been having a bit of an internal struggle. Well, maybe not entirely internal, since I tend to either blog about my feelings or scream about them. But anyway, I'm having a bit of a struggle. Specifically, I am struggling with allowing my baby to grow up.

And yes, I am well aware that my baby is 15.

But this has been the most difficult process of my life. Seriously. It's way, way worse than my struggle to resist the siren lure of chocolate. Or resisting all the pretty eye shadows at Sephora. (Side note: why can't I resist blue eye shadow? Really, it looks pretty in the box, then I get it home and realize I'm not a blue eye shadow type of person-mainly because it makes me look like I should have a job at Ringling Brothers).

Anyway, I've been resisting allowing my baby to become a man. Or possibly even a toddler. And no, I'm not proud of this. It's not who I thought I'd be as a parent, to be honest with you. But the minute Junior became taller than me, what did I do? I started wearing high heels. People, please. I haven't worn heels since the 90s, unless you count my Shape Up walking shoes.

But I went out and bought a whole bunch of wedge sandals (um, in my defense it was BOGO time at Payless). And I felt better because then I was taller than him. Or at least I was until last week when I suddenly realized that even with my 3-inch heels Junior was eye level with me.

And when he wanted a curfew earlier than 11 PM for movie night at a friend's house, what did I do? I resisted, of course. What the heck was I thinking? I mean, the kid was down the street, at the home of our neighbor who is a police officer, watching a movie with 5 or 6 other teenagers. Thankfully, Hubby stepped in before I became irrational and he allowed Junior to stay later.

And then there was yesterday when my son asked to get his ear pierced.

Now I should say that part of me doesn't care. Hubby has a pierced ear, done as a ritual when he became a SCUBA instructor. I actually kind of think it's sexy, but then again, I still think Simon LeBon is cute so I believe it may be obvious that I never left the 80s. Anyway, when Junior asked, I was pretty ambivalent. He's a good kid, has good grades and actually likes me most of the time. What more can I ask from a teenager?

On the other hand, I'm kind of torn. He's 15. I wonder if that's too young to pierce. I also wonder where this request has come from. Very few of his friends have earrings. I know freshman year is a time of trying to decide what group you are in and who you are, so I wonder who my son is trying to be? Himself? Or somebody else? And before you ask, Hubby doesn't care at all, and in fact thinks it's fine. It's me who can't agree and per our parenting agreement, until I agree Junior doesn't get an earring.

So tell me, what do you all think? Is this gangsta? Should I be worried? Or should I let him do it and then go down to Payless and get 5-inch heels?

============================================================================

Laurie Sontag is a Parenting Guru on Shine who is finding that raising a teenager is way more difficult than it looks. Also? That snarky attitude she's had her entire life has definitely been passed onto her son.

Like her on Facebook or visit her blog so you don't miss another minute of her neurotic parenting.