I am the first one to say we need to stop the bullies from bullying. I will also say we have to teach our children about bullies. There are going to be bullies, as long as we have parents and administrations that do not consider this to be a problem.
When we are proactive with our children, they are not taken by surprise by a sudden attack by a bully. Teens and pre-teens are affected the most. This is a difficult time in their lives to begin with. Going into junior high or high school, acne, raging hormones, noticing boys, noticing girls, their emotions are all over the place. If they are not warned about this type of person, it could be fatal. The kids that have hung themselves, shot themselves, they had no clue how to handle this bullying. You cannot blame the parents, when we were in school the bullies called you names, but nothing like it is now.
Parents have to know what their children are up against. The bullies now are not just boys, its girls too, and girls can be much more vulgar than boys. The names that they use, I will not print here, but you can imagine. The girls can be not just more vulger but tougher than boys. They may be jealous of another girls looks or maybe their boyfriend looked at her.They could be boys who want to show off in front of a girl, or in front of their friends. Such childish acts to us, but it can lead to much more dangerous acts. When there is this type of drama, school takes a back seat to fear of what is going to happen. No longer is school about learning, it is about surviving another day of name calling, pushing, making fun of, and more. You may notice a drop in grades. A lack of interest in going to school or anything going on in school. Depression, sadness, crying and not eating may be a few signs, something is wrong. With young men, it could be depression, anger, picking on younger children, just a turnaround in behavior, something is wrong.
The computer is whole other animal. The bullying can be just as bad, and just as dangerous. It is more important today than ever to keep up with that your child is doing on the computer. You can notice if they seem upset when they are on the computer or right after they get off. If they seem to avoid the computer after being on it constantly, there could be a problem. Anytime you notice your child not acting like themselves, depressed, crying or anything out of the ordinary, that is the time to act. A boy may be angry, refusing to eat, not wanting to be around family, bullying younger siblings, sadness.
This is a problem that parents need to stand up and stop. If it takes mandatory classes for bullies that show what it can lead to. It may sound harsh, but I believe they need to be shown children who have killed themselves over bullying. Maybe it would show at least some of them, this is serious. I firmly believe that if the mandatory classes do not work, make the parents pay. If little Joey cost them a couple of thousand dollars because he is a bully, he will probably stop or be put in another school.
Until this happens, we have to prepare our children, we cannot count on schools to protect them. Schools today are having to deal with shootings, drugs, crime, things we never even thought of. Our children have to be taught their worth, their wonderfulness, how important they are. They have to have self-respect, this will not only help them dealing with bullying, it will help them overall.
If one of our children tells us they are being bullied, we have to listen, not just brush it off. Today, it is more important than ever. You may not think your child is vulnerable or easily affected by this. None of the parents whose children have committed suicide thought their children were, either.The sad fact is, most kids that age have no concept of death, it is just a way to escape the torture they are going through,
Talk to that child, find out what is being said. They are looking for someone to stand up for them, because they have no idea how to handle this. We cannot keep wanting the teachers and schools to take care of bullying. If parents do not teach their children it is wrong to bully, teachers are going to have little effect. If that parent is hit with a suit, they are going to stop that child. There may be some that disagree, and think that filing suit against the parents is harsh, but the suicide of a child is much more harsh.
We Have to Teach Our Children About BullyingParenting – Sun, Nov 20, 2011 4:36 AM EST
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