The Great Mom Debate: Do You Let Your Children Attend Sleepovers?

Also my brother and I were talking one day.. and he was saying how my parents need to lighten up because we need to know what's gonna happen. Know how it feels and let danger come... not like throw them in a road with cars coming by but I mean know how it feels at a sleepover, what happens, learn how people are and all that stuff.

I have allowed my kids to sleep overs, but growing up I went to slumper parties 5 to be exact and we lived across the street of 2 of them the parents left all night. My older sister was there but the first time that happened I was in K. I meet the parents and I have to know them for a few years before I let them. But some incidents that have happened during the past years I won't let them spend the night at certain families because I listen to my instinct and it hasn't been wrong yet.

When I was a kid, my parents allowed sleep overs at friend's houses when they knew the parents and the child. It was at one of those houses I was first introduced to porn (at age 10). Needless to say I didn't know what to do...I was only 10! It had a negative impact on me that has reached into my adult life. Our children can host friends at our house, but we won't be allowing our children over at friends houses. Sleep overs aren't a must in a child's development. Children will grow up to be happy, well adjusted adults without having been to even one sleep over! :) I bristle a bit at the phrases other parents are using such as, "There is no reason to avoid sleepovers". OF COURSE THERE IS REASON, and I'm living proof. Your children are your responsibility. No one else can tell you what is best for your kids, you're the expert on them. Don't be swayed by popular opinion, who parents democratically? That's how you run a country, not a family.

my mom didnt let me go to sleepovers. or go to friends' house (or in my case, my frienD's house, singular) after school or for whatever. oh, but she was always invited over to my house. it makes having/keeping friends hard, even now, since i stayed home for college, because it was so one-sided; you can come over/we can go out and do something (if one of my parents are the drive-arounder), but whenever you invite me to hang out/sleepover i have to say no. i dont even get why anyone would WANT to come over to my house; i only recently got a wii, but in high school all i had were board games, tv, books and my computer. and i did a majority of those things without a friend over, so why invite someone over to do the same tedious things that you do by yourself?
anyway, that's my experience.

Sure, I went to "slumber parties" and my kids do as well. I know the parents from athletic teams my kids are on or they go to our church. When we host, my rule is no more than 4 kids. We make hot dogs or pizza and popcorn. Pick up by 10:00 the next morning. No big deal.

Only if I know the parents REALLY WELL!!!!

Sleepovers were so much fun!! Bombing the first girl that fell asleep, toliet papering trees, eating tons of junk food, ect! Of course my parents knew all the girls that would be there and there were always parents there- otherwise I dont think they would have let me go. Sleepovers are a fun an easy way to socialize with friends, gossip, talk about boys, ect!

If parents don't feel comfortable sending their kids to a friends home then; maybe its time to get to know the parents, maybe you should host a sleepover at your home, ect. Dont deny a rite of passage because theres scary things going on! Theres scary things going on everywhere, dont be a helicopter parent, let your kids be kids and enjoy the lack of sleep and sugar high!

I never had any when I was a kid but had friends who did have them. I guess it's all right so long as the parents really know the other children's parents. And of course to keep the sleepovers single gender only, of course (no boy-girl sleepovers for obvious reasons)

Ugh no freakin' way. Not because I'm overprotective or see danger around every corner, but my home is my sanctuary. Not dealing with other people's brats over here all night, I'm not a fan of anyone here overnight (even relatives) because I'm a very private person. I also travel for work a few months of the year and when I'm home, I want to relax and see my family. So sleepovers will not be happening here.

My son had sleep overs at our house almost every weekend from 5th grade till just a month ago.
It was any were from his one best friend to the core of the football team!
It was great because guys talked louder than they knew and I could listen if I wanted.
The guys were never in trouble with drugs, alcohol, or the law. All of them have graduated college now and all of them have jobs in their field of study!
Just a month ago was because he was in one of his buddies wedding in our home town and the guys (some with girlfriends) feel comfortable at our home.
I have the same open house with my daughter, no co-ed until they are in college however.

Not allowing any sleepovers is kind of silly. You have to let go of trying to control the occasional late night, belly full of junk food etc. If you know and trust the parents, why not?

A 'rite of passage'? Hell yes sleepovers are a rite of passage! And you want to deprive your children of this? Just making sure I'm getting this right; because you are afraid of molestors and underage drinking? If you let your child go to a house of a child molestor, you need help. If you have not meet the parents, felt comfortable and conversed, then you are clearly going about sleepovers wrong. Underage drinking?! Your child is 9! Again, if your child is hanging out with another NINE year old that drinks, you have clearly not done a good job of watching over your child. Rules are fine, meeting parents, but my God, just not letting them?! Awful, know the parents of the friend, make sure dangerous items are away, and my goodness don't deprive the children of sleepovers.

Overprotecting your child will only hurt them in the long run.

Eventually they are going to leave the nest, and if you over protect them now, they will not have the skills to deal with adulthood and reality (which, sorry, isn't always pretty).

I certainly understand not allowing very young children not to sleepover, but by the age of 9 or 10 it should certainly be allowed. And as for avoiding bad things, tell your child to call you if anything they feel odd about happens. And educate them about the things that could happen. If you teach your children to be smart, they will bel

My step daughter (soon to be 15) has a friend sleep over just about every weekend. This weekend we had one girl on Friday night and will be picking up a different friend for Saturday night. But I draw the line at 2 friends over at once and no boys allowed since they sleep in her room. We just want her to get our approval before some random girl is staying the night. I think as she gets older she may grow out of this but it has been this way since she was 10 and we know the 3 usual girls that sleep over.

Sleep overs were always at our house because it felt safer.

I have officially lost all faith in humanity. You people are ridiculous.

It seems like most of my kids' friends are SUPER BRATS!!! Rude and ungrateful and that doen't fly with me. So I say no to having the sleepovers at my place. if I know the parents well enough, then my children are more then welcome to stay over there LOL

I'm totally with you. the party will be at my house for all the same reason. Great for you. I too expiernced things i wouldn't want my child to see/hear/or other dangers.

When my kids were younger, I had a strict policy; they only got to do sleepovers if it was a close friend's birthday. Now they're teenagers and I say no to sleepovers because once you start with them, you will have kids camping at your house or your kid camping at someone else's every weekend. It's tiresome--literally! During summer my kids can have a friend spend the night once every two weeks, no more. During the school year, they can't have sleepovers except on winter and spring break.

Like the others have said I would have to know who the parents are
and know where the parents will be when the sleep over is going on
i also would want to make sure the parents contact me if there was a problem