User post: Just An Ordinary Day


It was a typical morning in the Mommyfriend household.

The alarm sounds at 4:45 a.m., I stumble out of bed to check the computer. Awesome, 7 spam blog comments and a solicitation for male enhancement. Because I need that.

I make my way to the shower. I don't shave. I get out and find Little BooBoo standing in the dark doorway all silent and Children of the Corn-like. It freaks me out. I tuck him into my bed next to a snoring Big Daddy P.

I attempt to blow dry my hair as quietly as possible on low. It's takes forever. BooBoo keeps shouting, "Too loud Mommy!", sigh.

I'm tired. I look hungover. Great, hungover without any of the fun that generally comes from a night before looking hungover.

My head hurts, it's 5:15 a.m. and it's too damn early to be doing this. Big Daddy P goes to get BooBoo ready for preschool. BooBoo fights with him about wanting to wear pajamas to school. I can hear it through the baby monitor along with ridiculous reverb. They argue over who gets to squeeze the toothpaste. BooBoo begs for a rubberband. He cries over losing a little green bead he had collected. He wakes Boy Wonder.

It's now 5:40 a.m., BooBoo and Boy Wonder begin arguing over a Leggo gun the size of my thumbnail. They're standing in my closet. I need to get dressed; they're in my way. I beg for an inch of space.

I'm late, it's 5:52 a.m. and I'm not even dressed yet. The boys go downstairs and begin fighting over a Bob the Builder umbrella. Boy Wonder hasn't cared about Bob the Builder for 5 years. It's going to be 90ºF today, why are they fighting over a freaking umbrella?!

I make it downstairs. It's 6:03 a.m., crap, I am so late. I quickly ask Boy Wonder what the meaning of democracy is, he has a social studies test today. I need to fix a travel mug of coffee stat, my pounding head is begging me. I accidentally hit BooBoo in the head with the silverware drawer as I swoop in for a spoon. He cries. He begs for a band-aid.

Big Daddy P buckles BooBoo into my car. I say goodbye to Boy Wonder, but first, what's a ballot? I forget to say goodbye to Big Daddy P.

We sit in traffic. I answer BooBoo's questions about caterpillars, Spiderman and rainbows. He begs me to sing the "Thankful" song. I don't know what he's talking about, he must have learned it from school. I try to fake it, he tells me I'm doing it wrong.

We get to school. He moves slower than slow to the gate. He begs me to carry him. He weighs 35 lbs and I'm in heels. I refuse, I like having unbroken ankles. He cries. I tell him to hurry, I'm late. He tells me he's late.

I take him to his classroom and give him a kiss goodbye. He's distracted by a toy dinosaur and ignores me. I try to sneak out, he screams for me. I race back in and give him another kiss and another goodbye.

I get to work. It's 7:23 a.m., late. I have 33 emails, 7 voicemails and a meeting in 7 minutes.

Let the day begin.

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