When you first begin seeing someone there are many things you need to consider. The dating world is polluted with many different kinds of people, and not all are the honest type. From married men to "down low" men, you never truly know who anyone is right off the bat. It is important you speak up and ask questions. These are some of the things women often neglect to ask and later they find themselves in devastating situations.
Have you been tested?
Men often don't get a sexually transmitted disease panel done after each partner they have. Sometimes they fear the results, and other times they just don't care enough. Women are more avid about check-ups, but that doesn't mean if his ex had something she would tell him. It is always best to make sure you see his proof of the test. There have been so many stories in the media about men with HIV infecting unsuspecting woman as a game of revenge. If you can prevent something like this from happening, why wouldn't you?
Are you married?
It is incredibly sad that this even has to be a question asked. Men are often good at deceiving women and having double lives. If he tells you he is single, you will have to believe him at his word. There will be signs if he does have someone else, whether it is a wife or another girlfriend. Make sure you cover all your bases so if there is a secret exposed, you don't blame yourself for ruining someone's family. A close friend was roped into a situation like this. The man was extremely nice and they spent a lot of time together. He was able to get her to believe that he was not married because he was from out of town, and worked in our city on business. It was too easy for him to separate both lives.
Are you interested in men?
Unfortunately this is another question that should be asked, provided there are signs that would make you consider this a possibility. Often men live on the "down low" and use women to cover for their overnight activities. Contracting a sexually transmitted disease is a possibility here, especially if he doesn't protect himself with his partners. This situation leaves you open for heartbreak more than anything. I watched as someone very close to me found out the man she loved was in love with another man. It broke her heart, and the hearts of her children. Their family was ripped apart because he was dishonest.
It is so sad that the dating world has become clouded with lies and deceit. There are so many reasons that you need to be cautious now, it is almost not worth putting yourself out there. Make sure that protecting yourself is your number one goal, and be sure to ask these questions if you feel something sneaky may be happening behind your back. It is always better to be safe than sorry.
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