When I ran across a CNN story about the worst foods to bring on planes, I totally agreed: hard-boiled eggs and tuna salad are the worst when you're stuck in a metal tube for hours.
But thinking back on my plane rides, the only time I can remember being angry about food on a plane is when I got sick trying to eat almonds and read a magazine at the same time. Some of my worst inappropriate-food experiences actually come from other places, and the biggest offenders tend to be people who sneak food into movie theaters.
Chances are, if you're sneaking food into a theater, you're either a) too cheap to buy the candy and popcorn there, or b) you think you're being creative by bringing a picnic to a movie. But we all know that creativity and thrift can easily coalesce into a vortex of obnoxiousness. So next time you decide to combine dinner and a movie, please remember to avoid these three foods. Your crotchety fellow moviegoers will thank you.
1) Leftovers. Many movie theaters are attached to large malls or complexes that include restaurants. Maybe it's too big of a hassle to run to the car in between dinner and the movie to put your leftovers away, especially if you're running late. But during the movie, leave your leftovers in the container. No one wants to be sitting in front of the guy pulling out his spaghetti in the middle of the movie. Unspoken rule: If it involves cutlery, you should not be eating it in a dark theater.
2) Loud Food. If you're going to sneak food into the theater, try to avoid something crinkly, like an entire bag of Doritos. Nothing ruins that tense, quiet moment right before the monsters attack like someone meddling with a cellophane package. If you're going to sneak that stuff in, at least take care of any packaging situation during the trailers.
3) Liquor. Yes, there are some awesome movie theaters that serve beer and wine, but there's no quicker way to get kicked out of a theater (or in bigger trouble) than getting caught with mini bottles of liquor in your purse. Barf in a theater should be candy and popcorn induced, not liquor induced.
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