The 7 biggest fattest wedding complaints

I have to agree with the last person. The day is about the couple. If they want the cake smashed in the face, or not, it's still their choice. After all, they are the ones with cake on their face, not you. The waiting in between can get rather boring, but the specifics of the wedding, what they have or not, are for them. You're just there to be happy for them on their big day, however they decide to do it.

To Shanq ~ the person who was invited to the wedding ceremony, but not the reception. You're right, I can't think of anyone who would not consider that to be tacky and inappropriate. However, Churches are public places, and I have seen that same thing done before where someone would be invited to the ceremony, but not the reception, because as the bride put it, "We can't afford to have everyone that we want at the reception". Then she went on the brag about how lavish her reception was going to be. A group of us went to the wedding, to support her marriage, but we 'forgot' to go to the reception. The reason? Not everyone from our group of friends was invited to the reception. Ironically her marriage lasted less than 1 year, and the friend ship ended when we realized that she was choosing some friends over others.

My pet peeve are people that do not know who to interpret a wedding invitation. The names on the inner envelope are who is invited so if there are not the names of children on it, do not think you can respond on the RSVP that your children will be there.

My husband and I were invited at the last minute to a wedding and we had a week to RSVP. It was for a long time family friend/co-worker's son (the son also worked with our family). The invite was addressed to my husband plus guest. We've been married 15 years - as long as the groom worked with the family. We asked where the couple was registered and no one called us back to let us know so we went and purchased something we thought a newly weds could use (or return and still get a nice gift). The wedding was on a Friday around 4p.m. so we had to leave work early to make it to the wedding.

We met the bride for the first time at the reception. I cannot say she was cordial to us in any way but was overly friendly to her co-workers. Long story short - it's been 4 months and we still haven't seen or heard a thank you for anything.

Brides - please consider finding out who is or is not married and address the invitations properly. After all, it's the "plus guest" in a marriage who usually picks out the wedding gift and for goodness sakes at least THANK people for coming to your wedding!!!!!

My largest complaint at a wedding isnt usualy food related. Mine has to do with the music. Ive been a DJ for the last 10 years and ive done some outlandish things to keep the happy couple happy but what is with all these people that decide karaoke is a good idea? Especially at a wedding. ITS NEVER A GOOD IDEA!!!!!!!!!

At my wedding we had a buffet and we paid for 2 kegs of beer and all the soda and each guest got 1 free mixed drink..if they wanted more drinks they paid for it themselves..that way no-one was getting wasted and driving home...we also didn't do the smash of the cake in the face...that is the dumbest thing ever...I didnt want to do the money dance but the guests wanted to so my husband and i both danced with guests and got money-it was fun...We had the wedding and reception at the same place so no-one had to wait for hours while we took our pictures...it is so much more fun if you just relax and have fun--my dress got stepped on 3 times and ripped alittle-know what? i didnt care-had a blast...

I think having a Cash Bar is tacky. According to 'proper etiquette' (can't remember if it was Emily Post or someone else), you as a host do NOT ask your guests to pay for their own refreshment...they are at the venue as YOUR guests(not random customers of the hotel, restaurant, whatever who just happen to be there that day). Besides, they've most likely already shelled out for a wedding present, bachelor party, bridal shower, engagement party, etc. or a combination of these, you can show them hospitality. There are any number of alternatives to a 4 hour top-shelf free for all, such as beer and wine on the table (place just enough for each guest to have something, or not, and when it's gone, it's gone) or as someone else said offer a choice of alcoholic or non-alcoholic punches or signature cocktails. As for limiting the # of guests, again, the 'proper' way to do it is to make your guest list FIRST, and THEN plan an appropriate celebration that fits your budget. Excluding Great Aunt Bertha or not letting any of your cousins bring their signficant others just so you can have lobster and caviar at the Waldorf Astoria rather than chicken marsala at the Hilton is not worth the potential lifetime of hurt feelings.

Re Destination weddings, personally I believe it is the height of selfishness to expect people to shell out hundreds (or more) of dollars, miss work or use up their vacation days, make arrangements for their kids, etc. for the honor of seeing YOU get married in Jamaica. (unless its a small, lowkey second marriage or the individuals are older folks and their peers have already paid of their mortgages, put their kids though school, etc. and you KNOW they are in a position to afford it). If you want pretty pictures in your bridal finery on a romantic beach somewhere in February, pack your dress/tux in your suitcase and hire a photographer while you're on your HONEYMOON. And do you really want all your wedding guests hanging around with you for the rest of the week? Or do they have to turn around and leave the next day so you can be "alone"?

For the rest of the issues (fried food, vegetarian, long time between service and reception, running out of entree), ya know what? The people who pay for the event get to choose. Deal with it or do what my husband and I do...when we're enroute to the service, we scope out the area for a sports bar, local pub, even a Bennigan's type place if we know there will be lag time. If we suspect there might not be the kinds or amount of food and drinks that we'd like, we relax, watch a ballgame, get a little something to tide us over, then show up to the event in a good frame of mind because we're not bored or starving.

Oh yeh the smashing cake or tossing garter traditions? Outdated, sexist and quite frankly stupid. That said if either or both practices offend you, don't stand there tsk-tsking your disapproval - to each his own, after all -- just take the time to "powder your nose".

Anybody that has attended or planned a wedding has a story, because, as previously stated, something always comes up. (I've been at an at-home wedding where the bride ripped her fancy white cocktail dress and, to her chagrin, wore a business-casual pantsuit down the aisle.) The point is this kind of dialouge helps others who may be planning their wedding figure out what works, what doesn't, and help them gain a sense of flexibility that will no doubt come in handy. Now for my thoughts on...

Cash Bar
Tacky, tacky, tacky. I can't say it enough. Between the bridal shower, the wedding gift, and all other expenses, I don't your guests have earned a drink. How you do is totally up to you. The idea of a signature wedding cocktail is cute but rigid. Throw it in with the standard beer or wine, and I'd say you have yourself a winner. Also, I personally see nothing wrong with a "dry" wedding, especially if it's a family affair, the majority of your guests are known non-drinkers, and/or takes place during the daylight hours like mine did. Talk about a waste of money... We ran out of bottled water half-way through the reception, went through all the iced tea and soda, but were literally giving away wine and cases of beer afterwards because no one drank it!

Big Journey, Small Bites
I've never attended a destination wedding, but my understanding is that *because* they tend to be smaller and more intimate, you can afford to step up your game. Continue your theme and save some money by asking about local (read: more available and affordable) favorites.

All Fried Food
GAG. I've observed this more times than I can count. Fried food is not only unhealthy but downright gross once it's no longer fresh from the kitchen. If you can't figure out how to inject some variety into your menu, find a caterer who can!

No Veggie Option
"According to an April 2008 poll, 3.2 percent of Americans claim to be vegetarians, and 10 percent claim to follow a "vegetarian-inclined" diet." This bugs me so much. I've seen my vegetarian nieces and friends stuck nibbling crudites while others ate like kings. It's not hard to throw in a veggie-centric dish, people. Just ask Google.

Never-Ending Waits for Food Service
Don't neglect this part of your wedding. "Wedding Purgatory" often suggests a logistical problem or poor planning to your guests. Otherwise, wouldn't they be able to just go right into the celebration?

Running Out of The Big Ticket Entree
You have to know by the time you get married that it's less embarassing to pass off left-overs than run out of food on the big day. Remember that during future family events as well.

The Wedding Cake Face Smash
I threatened my husband with an annulment if he put cake anywhere near my face. A dear friend of the family spent two and a half hours doing my hair and make-up, and he was not about ruin it. Eventually, we skipped the traditional cake altogether in favor of a dessert table including cheesecakes, petit fors, edible arrangements, etc., *and* my caterer included it as our "dessert course" for no extra charge!

Why don't all of the wedding participants take pictures 2 hours before the wedding. Then after the ceremony all can go have fun together.

I dont think you need to offer a open bar, but beer and wine should be paid for the rest of the alcoholic drinks can be cash. I think if you are asking people to come out to share in your special day and you want them to wish you well and also give you a nice gift (possibly even more then one gift with showers and bachlor and bachlorette parties) you should be concerned about your guests. If you invite people over to your house for a party and they are your guests you make sure they are comfortable, and you have food and drinks that everyone would like to eat and drink. Sometimes that includes making something special. Most people not only have to give you a gift, if they are traveling then they have to pay for gas or airfare, hotel, and possibly a new clothing option. All and all weddings are not cheap for anyone so your wedding does not have to have a 5 star meal or have everything included but it is important to make it nice and enjoyable for all.

In the end there will always be people who will complain but i think you should try your best to make sure everyone has something they would want and like. Also when there is a long time between the vows and the dinner most people have to go out and get themselves lunch too. Even if it goes right in with apps, by the time you usually eat dinner you are very hungry so i think it is important to be understanding of that and have enough apps and drinks.

oh, and btw,i think this whole article is STUPID and the writer of this article wants to ruffle up some feathers and did a f*in good job of it too.

Re: the cake smash, not only did I warn my fiancee not to smash cake in my face, I also made sure there were forks set out for our cake cutting, so when we fed each other a bite of cake, we didn't have to cup an entire piece of cake in hand and try to delicately give the other a nibble (not to mention having a sticky hand touch my silk wedding gown and leave a stain). We kept it elegant by just feeding each other a bite from a fork, like any civilized person would do when feeding themselves cake anyway. Plus, that was also extra insurance against getting cake smashed in my face - no way would he try to stab me in the face with a fork! :)

I had a cash bar and everyone was fine with it because most people didn't drink... I don't see the point of buying a ton of expensive alcohol (even the cheap stuff) if no one is going to drink it... :-/

And we had a buffet and it worked out perfectly.

And we didn't do the wedding cake smash... but my husband bit my finger (intentionally and not hard)...

A wedding is about two people committing to spend their lives together, not making sure family and friends have free alcohol and a feast. People need to quit bitching and remember why they're there. I'm sorry but wedding pictures are important and shouldn't be rushed because adults are too busy or absent minded to eat before an event. I can understand children complaing but the adults should keep there mouths shut. Thanks for the gift, but that doesn't mean we owe you unlimited food and beverages.

Oh! I just thought of another thing that is annoying at weddings: when guests constantly "clink" glasses to get the couple to kiss. It's an annoying sound to begin with and people seem to do it every 5 minutes. I'm like, "Let the couple eat their meal!"

I have been both a guest at many weddings and then a MOB (Mother of the Bride). As a host, the most important thing is the comfort and happiness of your guests. We had family and friends flying to AZ from HI, NJ, FL,CA, IL etc., paying airfare, hotel, rental cars, wedding and shower presents, etc. They also took time out of their busy schedules to be with us. I felt an obligation to make sure they were well fed, comfortable, respected and happy. You don't have to have a lot of money to do this! It's about care and concern for others, not about a dog and pony show. Don't make the guests wait more than an hour for picture taking. That is selfish. I once attended a wedding where the wait after the ceremony was over 2 hours while the photographer took a million pictures. The guests just hung out hungry and thirsty(appetizers and bottled drinks ran out quickly). There are things you can do,like not make people wait a long time for you, and then there are things that just happen out of your control (like rain, caterer problems, cake problems like the lard cake mentioned above). You'll laugh about those things in a few years. But if your guests are having a good time and are treated well, then the wedding party can relax and have a good time.

My wedding was pet peeve free. Pot luck in the park.

How about the people who RSVP and then are a no-show. At $75.00/plate, it's terrible to have someone not show after you have paid for their meal. Also, it was surprising how many people didn't bother to RSVP and then you have to make phone calls a week before the event.

the garter belt tradition... Really? In 2010? You MUST be kidding.

I think couples should be able to have a cash bar if they want. At our wedding, we set a $600 bar tab limit. Once that limit was met it switched to a cash bar. You are there to celebrate a couples union, not get wasted. If you want to get wasted, go to a bar after the wedding.