If you're like me, you always try to believe the best in people. Unfortunately, there are guys who take advantage and instead use flattering words and romance as a weapon. Many of us have been there at least once and usually the primary reasons are for sex and/or money. It's not always the easiest thing to realize, often because we don't want to think someone who means something to us could use us in such a way. However, it does happen and it's important to keep in mind the signs that the guy in your life could be using you.
He only sees you when he can get something out of it
At first it may seem like he wants to spend time with you, but if he's only seeing you when the two of you have sex, you treat him to dinner or drinks, or if he doesn't have a car and you drive him somewhere, he's very likely using you. Let him know you're not one who can be used, then cut ties so you can find someone who treats you with more respect.
He talks about other women
Of course there's going to be times when a conversation will come up involving another woman, such as if he's telling you why his relationship ended with his ex, but if he makes it a habit it's a sign he's likely not interested in you. Of course this also goes along with you giving him what he wants, such as if you have sex with him and the next day he's telling you how he has a date with another woman that night.
He doesn't really try to get to know you
If a guy doesn't try to get to know you beyond the "Hey how are you?" then there's a good chance he's not as into you as you think he is. When a guy genuinely likes you or cares for you, he'll care how your life is going and want to know more about you. When he can have sex with you or take anything from you without caring much for anything past basic conversation, make a run for it.
He pouts when you say no
When you're doing something for a guy who is using you and you suddenly say no instead of yes, such as accepting his late night texts then out of nowhere passing up on them, he'll likely pout about it. Don't be surprised if he tries to make you feel bad either. There's a good chance he'll throw in some flowery language to try to get you to change your mind or make you think he's genuine, but if you already know he's using you, there's no turning back.
He tells you
If a guy flat out tells you he's only using you for sex, a ride, money or something else, he's not just kidding or being coy. He genuinely means it. Don't think he's just playing games; take him for his word. You're not going to be the one who is going to make him change or "save him," he has to be the one to do that all on his own.
You don't want to assume anything or make rash judgments, but it's important to trust your gut about whether or not you think he's using you. Actions usually speak louder than words, so if he's not making an effort to see you, call you, surprise you or do any other gesture that doesn't involve seeing you naked or getting something out of it, then you're better off putting him behind you and moving onto the next one.
More from Lauren R:
Dating Resolutions to Stick to in 2012
How to Conquer Your Fear of Rejection
Six Ways to Learn to Love Yourself
