Clients often tell me that they are frustrated that they have not yet met the right partner, and wonder why. They want to be in a relationship and are frustrated that it's not happening for them.
I've found that navigating the world of dating and relationships today takes equal measures of guts, smarts, patience and a strong dose of optimism. A lot of energy is spent putting on the best face when two people meet for the first time - yet frequently psychological barriers keep us from achieving the objective we so often desire.Does sex get better with age? Join Our Live Sex For Life Conversation on October 18th at 8 PM
If not being in a relationship is holding you back from having the life you crave, let's work together to:
- Set realistic goals. What are you looking for in a relationship, and what is getting in the way of achieving it?
- Take a trip down memory lane. Review your past relationships - what has worked and what hasn't? Is there something that is holding you back from having a healthy relationship? Make an honest appraisal of the past and make sure it's not impacting your present and future.
- Create a dating plan that suits your level of comfort and commitment. There are so many choices today for single people in regards to how to meet a partner. Create a plan that will work for you.
- Learn how to be yourself. It's always best to be your true and honest self when starting a new relationship. However, many of us have insecurities that hold us back from letting our potential partners know who we really are. Overcome shyness, fear of intimacy and other potential stumbling blocks that may be inhibiting you from moving forward and getting what you want in a relationship.
- A little patience can go a long way. Finding the right relationship takes time. It's important to try to stay positive and optimistic and learn from experiences and mistakes. Feeling desperate or hopeless will only derail the process and make you feel unhappy. Limit the pressure you put on yourself, hang in there and try to enjoy the ride.
More Relationship Advice From Rachel Sussman, LCSW:
genConnect.com is your place to connect with the best of life's experts across generations. Learn, share and engage with experts through articles, Q&A, groups, genConnect TV, genConnect Radio to enrich your career, health, relationships and lifestyle.About the author: Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, is a Marriage & Family Therapist and Relationship Expert working in private practice with individuals, couples, and families. Her website is www.sussmancounseling.com.
Photo © Shutterstock