At last -- some celebrity endorsements we can get behind!

Pörk, prepared specially by Ashton ButcherPörk, prepared specially by Ashton Butcher

These days every celebrity has haphazardly tacked their name onto a fragrance, clothing line, reality show, or beverage with no relevance whatsoever.

Here are some products we think might actually be marketable:

  • Ludacristal
  • Good Char-lattes
  • Eminems
  • Lindsay Lohamburgers
  • Madonuts
  • Advil Lavigne
  • Britney Spearmint gum
  • Kevin Feder-linens
  • America Ferarri
  • Mandy S'moores
  • Ellen Degenerators
  • J.Lotion
  • Lara Flynn's Soil
  • Justin Timberlatkes
  • Chris' Brownies
  • Halle Berries
  • Stephen King Crab
  • Sienna Miller ight
  • Lisa Marie Parsley
  • Bai Linguini
  • Gel Gibson
  • Adriana Lima Beans
  • -Pörk, prepared specially by Ashton Butcher