Beauty Is The Biggest Hindrance For Finding Love, At Least For Me

What is the biggest hindrance I've had so far in my love life? Beauty. There's no if's and's or but's about it. I've been heartbroken one too many times, and what, pray tell, is the common thread with each guy that disappeared? He would gush about how "beautiful" he thought I was. I've come to learn that he was talking about physical attributes and not the spiritual kind. That kinda sucks. Actually, it really sucks!

As I look back throughout the years of wondering how attractive I am to the opposite sex, I've had many mixed messages. As a teenager, I had a few crushes, and in the end, none of them would "make any moves" on me. It left me wondering if I looked like a freak, or if the guy was a closet homosexual, or maybe I just repelled men by nature. Over the years, I've learned that these men really were attracted to me, but were too shy to make any moves. How do I know? Well, let's just say chatting on Facebook can reveal a lot of hidden mysteries.

Now mind you, I have many insecurities about my "physical" beauty, and I wouldn't consider myself a "beauty queen." I have a nose that's split at the end, and nickname it "butt-nose." My toes are too short after the big toe, and I've been called "Barney Rubble feet." (Yeah, not very nice to say to anyone, but I digress). I have freckles that I'm getting with age, although, my sister has let me know they're "age spots." (TMI, sis). But every guy that I meet tells me things like, "you're even more beautiful in person," or "I get nervous around you because you're so beautiful." But sure enough, within a few dates, the mesmerized pursuer disappears with not much of an explanation about why he got spooked. My goodness, guys, I'm no Megan Fox, so please stop with the gushing and see me for my inner beauty for a change, would ya?

Pondering over why men seem to become intimated by me early on, or just use me for physical wants and needs has prompted me to a conclusion: beauty is a hindrance when it comes to finding love. The guys I've met seem hung up on whatever it is that they see in (or on) me. Just once, I'd like to be complimented for the amazing articles I've written about love and relationships. It would be nice to hear a guy say how he admires my love for helping others, and my need to volunteer my time and effort for my passions. Gosh, if he just said, "you have a beautiful soul," I would melt for the end of time. But alas, I have guys that become sidetracked by some shallow attraction for the "Heather Locklear" type aura, and I become a pretty face with no soul.

So where are these "nice guys" I've heard so much about? I have yet to meet one, but I have a feeling I would know instantly if he crossed my path. He might say something quirky like, "I love how you giggle like a girl," or "I think the way you dance in the car is irresistible." But so far, the "you are soooo beautiful" has been the kiss of death with courting men. I wish I was a plain Jane and had the comfort of knowing a guy that's interested in seeing me is actually interested in what he sees on the inside. So, I've chosen to go back on my "man diet," or "strike" or "boycott of men." They bring me down in my search for spiritual enlightenment. Sorry guys--at least the "good ones."

If anyone knows of a single guy that would appreciate a woman who can laugh at herself, dance like a teenager, sing like a bad contestant on American Idol, embarrass her kids by dancing in the car, and smile incessantly like Julia Roberts (and is easy on the eyes), drop me a line. I'm lurking in the shadows, and would love to hear from you.