The Great Presidential Election, the Greatest Gambling System

Hello.
wolf banderson here, and i am upset.
i was looking at the recent string of presidential electory macguffinism and i saw......
a sadistic joke. no punch line, just a jest, a joke that absolutely had to have a punch line, for the hopes and dreams of millions depended on it.
and isn't that the punch line?
vote for me! i'm mr. perfect!
no! vote for me! i'm black and think through all of my decisions!
vote for me, i'm backed by chuck norris.
vote for me, i love jesus!
vote for me! i hate homosexuality and promise to root it out for you!
vote for me, because, because.....you know what? fuck it!
vote for me, they say.
vote for the great, vote for the gloried, voted for the reasonable, vote for the popular, vote for the righteous.
In the end, these candidates pick one aspect of human nature and use it as their shield, never once realizing that the shield alone will never be enough.
we get a macabre of good ideals, but with just one ideal, with just one good aspect of the human condition, the others have to get lain by the wayside.
for what are we but imperfection incarnate? we feckless mortals see fit to mock or mindlessly agree with those who take incentive because we feel entitled to never take a stand.
and perhaps that too is another concept of our innate nature that we never notice.
so i watch them, i watch them as they pass me by in their glory, and i judge each in accordance with how he measures by the human condition/ popular culture ratio.
the man who hates homosexuals is found wanting, for a manhunt is never beneficial.
the woman who glories her lord is found wanting, for her desire to be one with god transcends her love of humanity, causing her to ignore those closest to her.
the man who is backed by chuck norris is found wanting, for he clings to the ever shifting adoration of others. how can he not know that a star shines so brightly that it would inevitably cast a shadow over his own image?
and so, we are left with the newest president, and the perfectionist candidate.
one is a hard working man, of this there is no doubt.
the other, a man of measured caution and no small military success as commander in chief. he gives in to caution and tries to help, in the face of an army of americans who secretly despise him. he is not trying to impress us, he is only attempting to do his job.
a job the perfectionist wants so badly that he unwittingly stumbles on the way to the chair of leadership. and this is okay, he is only human and entitled to mistakes, the responsibility changed the current president quite drastically, surely it will iron out the flaws in this one?
the men are no longer in question. however, the process by which they are elected is sick.
when i first deigned to notice the....election, i saw not an election, i saw a popularity contest.
and that was all i saw, mine wolfish eyes do not lie to me as they might a normal man.
i saw a popularity contest, no attempts were even made to hide this.
it was exactly that, mud slinging in private, perfectionist asskissing and marvelous panhandling performances in public.
the target of this panhandling? our votes no less.
these men wanted us to believe in them so badly that they all readily compromised their own identities to do so.
when they are in private, their time is devoted entirely to smearing the perfect campaigns of others.
what is this? are we now judging the merits of our presidents by how efficiently they can stab one another in the back? is this supposed to be some new form of sick jest aimed at our children and our adults?
am i, the king of the internet, supposed to call this, this INSULT a true election?
this is sick! back in my day the candidates kissed children, now they make warpaint and hire popular men to hide behind?!
i do not know if this is normal, i am truly foreign to the ways of human culture, but to mine eyes this is nothing more than a pitiful popularity contest followed by a nationwide raffle to decide who it is that may sit upon the great seat within the oval office.
and one is not allowed to become president if they do not have money to purchase services to help their image glimmer.
having a military often seals the deal, if there is no military record, then being sane is a side requirement.
but above all else, the president must be willing to look perfect, not reasonable, just ideal,
and what is more ideal than what is within popular culture?
this is sick, let us set that out of the way, the whole affair is an insult to me.
but, this is the reality,
just as reality, is the fantasy.
for what is real within the illusions of societal standards?