NDC: TOM CRUISE ARRESTED for SERIAL DIVORCERY

Frisha Ngu

NDC - 12 July 2012
I will certainly find it a little difficult to do anything more impressive in my cop career to beat this all time record of catching and arresting the hottest LLL (Love Live Leave) virus on block - TOM CRUISE.

Finding doubt-free evidence to nail this serial divorcer was one of the most challenging tasks I have ever handled. Previously, Tom's LLL virus was explained as a generous tendency to contribute in solving the "not-enough-men-to-go-round-because-women-outnumber-men" problem the world is currently facing; but I reserved a pinch of suspicion for serial crime tendencies. SERIAL DIVORCERY in particular.

SERIAL DIVORCERY is the mental condition in a person that has irresistible tendency to strangle the life out of their marriage once their victim has reached a target point such as target age, target weight, target career, or target number of kids. When Tom divorced 33 year old Mimi Rogers and cruised to Nicole Kidman's life, the generosity claim gave him an excuse. Then he divorced 33 year old Kidman and there, my suspicion of serial divorcery was triggered. And now, not only did Tom divorce 33 year old Katie Holmes, he made the divorce settlement so rapidly one may think he was trying to kill the marriage quickly before she hit 34.

Tom Cruise is now in NDCPD custody as investigations are currently going on in his famous church of Scientology which is suspected to breed serial divorcers, and either brainwashed Tom into becoming one, or encouraged his coming out as one. Is staying in marriage with older than 33 year old women a mission impossible for Tom Cruise? Is he just a marriage Cruiser? Is he a victim of unfortunate coincidental happenings? Is the church of Scientology secretly making a Muppet Show of his love life? Or is Tom actually a serial divorcer? Join the jury to decide in the case which will in the TRIBUNAL of NDC tomorrow. Stay tuned!
Bloggerly Yours,
Frisha Ngu

Also: Check out Kim Kardashian in jail for friendshual harassment of Beyonce-Z