Settling For Mr. Good Enough
In business, ''good enough'' is often ''very good.'' So why should we expect--and demand--perfection in dating and marriage?
By D.A. Wolf
I usually make a morning stop by Dad's House blog as I begin my day. There's always an entertaining read--the perspective of a single dad who talks about parenting and sex, cocktails and sex, Internet dating and sex...well, you get the picture. But this single dad is also keenly aware (and opinionated) when it comes to the world around him. This morning, his comments concern the soon-to-be released book by Lori Gottlieb, Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough.
I saw. I read. I paused. I flinched.
Settling for Less Than What You Want
Whoever titled this book got it wrong--and right. "Settling" is the sullen yet emotionally charged equivalent of being beaten (or beaten down), and cornered into accepting anything but exactly ... what ... we ... want.
It is the word used for agreeing to negotiations yielding an unsatisfactory result, and in a relationship, "settling" is ripe with negative connotations--in marriage or dating. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that "settling" in a relational context has everything to do with giving in, giving up and sometimes shutting up when it comes to the foibles of another human being--or aspects of our lives that leave us less than content.
Thus, the clearly intentional use of the word "settling" in (perfect) proximity to "good enough". Frankly, all aspects of this (successfully crafted) title rankle--excellent for book sales (I imagine), and irritating for those who, like me, realize that "settling for good enough" touches on much of what is wrong in our society.
Click here to find out why "settling" could either be your undoing or saving grace.
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See Also:
The Dating Game
A Married Name Without The Hyphen
In Pictures: Moments From A Marriage
My Turn, Your Turn
