Blog Posts by MJ Acharya

  • Singles: Here's how to handle "Date Your Mate" month.

    I have come to find out that May is "Date Your Mate" month. Now, as a single person, I tend to take offense to these theme months, or theme days (we have Valentine's Day, why do we also need Sweetest Day?) because there are NO theme days or months for singles. What's up with that?

    So, for the month of May, I propose that singles make it "Date Yourself" month. This does not preclude you from dating other people - you are single after all - but maybe just make it a special time to really take care of yourself. Here are a few things you can do to "date yourself" this month.

    Buy yourself a sex toy. Yes, you heard me. Whether it's a flesh light for men, or a new vibrator for the women, you can add some spice to the bedroom without a mate. Just because you're the only there does not mean that your physical needs should be neglected!

    Bring home some flowers. I like going to Trader Joe's or The Farmer's Market to pick up a bouquet of wild flowers. Flowers add a

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  • 5 Tips to Find a Date Before Valentine's Day

    You've just finished spending the holidays alone and now Valentine's Day is sneaking up on you. It's almost not fair. Sure, spending time with your girlfriends on Valentine's Day can be satisfying, but perhaps you would secretly prefer to spend the evening with a member of the opposite sex? Here are five proactive things you can do to increase the chance that cupid's arrow will pierce your heart before Valentine's Day:

    Volunteer - If you have the time, volunteering can be a great way to meet someone kind, giving and selfless. If you don't want to get dirty raking leaves or picking up trash, you can use your education to mentor teenagers, to promote literacy or to organize charity events. Even if you don't meet someone, volunteering is a great way to network, make new friends and, of course, help your community.

    Join your College Alumni Association - Even if you move to another city or another state after graduation, your college more than likely has an alumni group in your

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  • 5 Tips for Singles to Get Through the Holidays

    Let's face it, the holiday season can be a blessing and a curse. It can be a joyous time to celebrate religion and family and it can be a time of sadness and despair, thinking of friends and relatives that have passed on and thinking about relationships that have fallen into disrepair. It can also prove a difficult time for those of us that are single.

    So, what can you do to survive the season?

    1) Volunteer. Do anything - and you don't have to do it on Thanksgiving Day or Christmas Day or over Hannukah. You can volunteer any day this holiday season and still garner just as much satisfaction. Volunteering will also give you a good perspective about your life and just how great you have it compared to others.

    2) Spend time with your nieces and nephews. That's right! Take off your shoes and sit on the floor with them. Play Wii Fit Hula Hoop. Color, do puzzles, play rock band, play hide and seek. Remember what the holidays are all about - family and love.

    3) Visit your church, temple

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  • Your Ex Is Only Human

    Have you ever thought that your ex has no feelings? That he/she has no sense of remorse regarding your break up? That he/she is heartless? Have you ever wondered how he/she could have made the cold decision to break your heart?

    Do you ever wonder if he's even human?

    Right now you're angry and depressed, and you have every right to be, but have you ever thought about the painful decision your ex had to make to end your relationship?

    Your ex loved you at one point. He/she enjoyed spending time with you. He may have even been considering marriage. The possibilty of a break up had not even crossed his mind.

    Somewhere along the way, things went wrong in the relationship. Perhaps the two of you argued consistently about one problem in particular? Perhaps your friends didn't like him? Perhaps one of your quirks that he used to adore had gradually started to grate upon his nerves? Whatever the instance, something was inherently wrong in the relationship and it made him wonder if the

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  • Sex with the Ex

    When a relationship ends, some people say "When I'm done, I'm done!" But others may dwell in the gray area between "together" and "not together." This gray area generally includes sex of some kind - and usually there's only one person who initiates it; the dumper or the dumpee. Usually if the dumper does it, it's because he/she feels guilty or misses the intimacy that only sex can provide. When the dumpee initiates sex, it's generally in an attempt to show the ex what he/she is missing. But whether it's an attempt to manipulate an ex into getting back together, or just trying to "scratch an itch," sex with the ex can be a confusing act and it should not be considered lightly.

    Dumper: If you have just dumped the love of your life, the loneliness can eat at you. It's tough to not be able to pick up the phone and talk to your former best friend about the great events in your life. It's tough to watch movies and not have your ex on the couch to cuddle up next to you. Plus, it's hard

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  • 21st Century Tips to Help Heal a Broken Heart

    Let's face it. If you're trying to recover from a broken heart, sometimes grandma's advice just doesn't cut it. So we've put together some of these 21st Century Tips to help you get (and stay) on the road to healing.

    1) Throw yourself a pity party. Get some ice cream and eat your heart out, then rent sentimental DVD's and cry your eyes out. Contrary to popular belief, crying is actually good for you. A recent study published in Current Directions in Psychological Science, shows that after crying, your breathing and heart rate slows, which puts you into a relaxed state. So let it all out! It'll help.

    2) Erase. Don't chase. Delete your ex's number from your phone, text messages, emails, IM-buddy list, Facebook and any other social networking sites. The less contact you have with your ex, the less anxiety you'll feel and the sooner you'll heal.

    3) Join an online support network. Sign up for a free breakup recovery support site where you can share your story with other

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  • Trips to Help Heal a Broken Heart

    If you've ever been dumped before, then no doubt someone has advised you that "it takes time to mend a broken heart." You probably think that's trite, but it's actually true. It takes time to repair a broken heart and it's what you do in that time that will cause you to come out of this ordeal a bitter person or a better person. So you can spend all your time lying in bed, whining about your ex, or you can spend your time doing something constructive - like traveling! Hey, the term "travel therapy," didn't just fall out of the sky. It was coined for good reason:

    Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind. ~Seneca

    Whether it's a road trip or a Spring Break Trip with, travel will take you out of your current environment and help you "get your mind right." When you make the choice to get away from it all, you will be too busy to:

    • Spend your time waiting for the phone to ring
    • Constantly check your cell phone for text messages
    • Obsessively
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  • Do you trust your intuition?

    Have you ever heard someone say something like this to you?

    "I knew in my gut that he was cheating on me. I just knew it. But I chose to ignore it. I wish I had trusted my instincts!"

    So, tell me, if you're feeling like something is a little off in your relationship, what do you do? Do you trust your instincts or do you just ignore it because you're afraid that if you're wrong, you'll wreck the relationship? How do you find out what's "really" going on without wrecking the relationship?

    Do you get sneaky? Get creative? Or do you just go at the problem head on and confront him/her?

    Would love to know your thoughts!

  • Want to talk to someone about your breakup? check out our FREE forum!

    If your friends are sick of hearing about your ex, then join an online support forum like the one at

  • What do you do if your boyfriend goes on vacation and doesn't call?

    I have this Wordpress blog that allows me to see the terms/phrases you guys searched to get there. And usually the main phrase is, " How long should I wait to contact my ex ?" Like every single day…But this past weekend, an overwhelming majority of you searched, "Boyfriend goes on vacation - doesn't call."

    I really didn't realize that this was such a prevailing issue. But I can imagine how frustrating it would be to sit at home waiting for the phone to ring, not knowing if you should call (you don't want to interrupt him), or text (just so he knows you're thinking of him), or email (he'll check when he has time), or do nothing altogether (if he wanted to talk, he'd call!).

    I decided to chat with some people to see what they thought about the question. And the answers you see are the winning majority of a group of 5 people, 3 men, 2 women, all of whom are in successful relationships. Check out the timeline below to see what you should do.

    If he hasn't called in:

    1 day

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