Grand Central ceiling
Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes - ignore our advice at your own peril! (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.)
aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Here's a point: . Now get to it. We think you know what we mean.
taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
You're a walking Viagra advertisement this week - at least, the "before" part of a Viagra ad. A roll in the sack will be about as appealing to you as root canal work. Don't worry, it's not permanent. It happens to all of us, as they say. And don't let anyone make you feel bad because of it; remind them that absence makes the heart (among other organs) grow fonder.
gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
Prepare to be sexually distracted this week. Spring fever's hit you early this year and you're burning up. For those times you really can't give yourself a helping hand, just think, "Cold showers, baseball stats and Sesame Street." Otherwise, don't holdRead More »from Your Love Life Horoscopes