Blog Posts by EMandLO.com

  • The Bachelor’s Big Reveal: Juan Pablo & the Fantasy Suite Charade

    The Bachelor

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    Many episodes of The Bachelor of have been touted as "the most dramatic ever!" - last night's truly was.

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    It has been a long-time coming: 18 seasons to be exact (and that's not even counting all the spin-offs). But after yesterday's fantasy suite episode of The Bachelor with Juan Pablo, the veils have finally dropped, exposing the show as the anti-fairy-tale it actually is.

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    Cynics and smart people have known all along it was a sham, but the producers have always taken great pains to perpetuate the fairy-tale myth. For instance, every bachelor follows the script which dictates that he have no clue who he's going to choose until he wakes up on the morning of the final rose ceremony with sudden, miraculous clarity about his "one true love." No conversations about religion or politics are ever aired (do they even take place?), because matters of the heart are supposed to transcend that. And the vast majority of the women the producers

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  • Top 5 Love Lessons from the Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Hometown Dates)

    A hometown picnic on The Bachelor
    1. Dudes: No sleeveless tees over long-sleeved ones (even if they're attached and it's supposed to be a "look"). In fact, better yet: No sleeveless tees, period.

    2. If one of the parents of your date asks for either a private dance performance or a private dance lesson from you, quickly but tactfully get your date back by your side to immediately dilute the creepy factor (just as JP did with Andi's mom).

    3. It's 2014. You don't need to ask anyone's father's permission to propose marriage. But if you insist on asking for a blessing (or the more confrontational "Would you welcome me into this family?"), then ask both parents, not just the dad. (This applies to any ladies considering proposing as well.)

    4. Renee's mom said it best: "We can love our pets; but you need to be in love with the [person] you want to be with." Make sure you don't just have a "pet," or that you are the "pet."

    5. Don't meet the child of your date unless you're sure you see a future together. And

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  • Your Dating Style, According to 2014′s Oscar-Nominated Movies

    American Hustle

    Last week we dished up sex and dating wisdom from Matthew McConaughey, according to the various characters he's played over the years - from Dazed and Confused all the way through to True Detective. This week we're going to let you figure out your love/sex/dating style, according to which is your favorite Oscar-nominated movie of the list below…

     

    American Hustle

    You like saucy roleplaying (especially with wigs). And you approve of mind games, both in and out of the bedroom.

    We fight and then we f***, that's our thing. - Rosalyn Rosenfeld

    You're nothing to me until you're everything. - Sydney Prosser

    She was the Picasso of passive-aggressive karate. - Irving Rosenfeld


    Captain Phillips

    You think that communication is the cornerstone of all good relationships, and you won't give up until you've perfected this. You play by the rules, because that's how good relationships prosper.

    The problem is not me talking. The problem is you not listening. - Captain Phillips

    I came too far, I can't

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  • Your Love Life Horoscopes

    Grand Central ceiling


    Each week, we at EMandLO.com predict the course of your love life for the week with our own version of irreverent horoscopes - ignore our advice at your own peril! (Hyperbole intended for dramatic effect.)

    aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)


    Here's a point: . Now get to it. We think you know what we mean.

    taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)


    You're a walking Viagra advertisement this week - at least, the "before" part of a Viagra ad. A roll in the sack will be about as appealing to you as root canal work. Don't worry, it's not permanent. It happens to all of us, as they say. And don't let anyone make you feel bad because of it; remind them that absence makes the heart (among other organs) grow fonder.

    gemini (May 21st-June 21st)


    Prepare to be sexually distracted this week. Spring fever's hit you early this year and you're burning up. For those times you really can't give yourself a helping hand, just think, "Cold showers, baseball stats and Sesame Street." Otherwise, don't hold

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  • Sex & Dating Advice from Matthew McConaughey's Movie Characters

    Jared Leto and Matthew McConaughey sit on a bench in Dallas Buyers Club.
    There's been a lot of talk lately about how Matthew McConaughey has reinvented himself as a Serious Actor, launching himself out of the chick flick ghetto (Ghosts of Girlfriends Past et al) and into Oscar-nominated territory with Important Movies like Dallas Buyers' Club. But what we want to know is, how has his characters' approach to love and sex changed over the years, and over the movies?

    Turns out, it's not just McConaughey's Rust Cohle in HBO's True Detective who has a bit of a philosophical bent. It was there from the start -- it's just been honed over the years, you might say. So here is a chronological timeline of McConaughey's advice on love and sex over the years, according to his characters.


    1993: Dazed and Confused
    "That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."


    1997:
    Contact
    "Is the world fundamentally a better place because of science and technology? We shop at home, we surf the Web... at the same time,

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  • Dream Interpretation: I Kissed My Mentor & Now I Feel Awkward in Real Life

    The passionate couple engaged in a tender kissThe passionate couple engaged in a tender kiss

    Other people's dreams are never interesting…except when they're about sex. Each week, our dream analyst Lauri Loewenberg tells one lucky reader what their dirty dream means. Got a dream you want Lauri to analyze? Click here to submit it (18 and older only, please). This week, a reader asks Lauri:

    I am in a relationship. Despite that, I had a dream, about my mentor kissing me. He is a colleague and a mentor. I can't decipher the meaning. It was pretty intimate and now I find it a little difficult to face him in office. Please help.

    lauri_loewenberg_100lauri_loewenberg_100Lauri: Don't you worry about this dream, young lady! It's perfectly understandable that it would be difficult for you to look your mentor in the eye after such a steamy dream, but let me assure you that the meaning behind this dream is not what you think. In my practically billions of years of research on dreams, I have found that kissing in a dream can actually be connected to conversation in waking life. Just like kissing, it takes two mouths to

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  • Top 5 Love Lessons from the Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 7)

    Juan Pablo's group date on The Bachelor (Ep 7)Juan Pablo's group date on The Bachelor (Ep 7)


    1. If you're looking for an "intellectual connection" with a potential mate (like Sharleen), don't go on "The Bachelor."

    2. If your date makes you wish you were a little dumber (like JP makes Sharleen wish she were), then that is a clear sign this relationship should be kept squarely in the booty call zone -- a marriage of intellectual equals just ain't in the cards. After all, the ideal relationships exist when both parties think the other one is by far the smarter of the two. (By the way, Sharleen, nice subtle dig on the brain capacity of all the other ladies vying for JP's affections -- zing!)

    3. If you're going to check out someone's rack, be subtle about it (see Juan Pablo at the very end his date with Sharleen -- at minute 26 on TiVo -- for what NOT to do).

    4. Calling someone your "boyfriend" doesn't make it so (Nilki).

    5. If you dump someone, don't let them make you feel better about it. You can outwardly feel bad about it, but don't play the hurt victim who needs to be taken
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  • My Boyfriend Doesn’t Want to Go on Dates Anymore

    If only all couch potatoes looked this good

    Dear Em & Lo,

    I have been married and divorced and only just started to date again. Been with this guy for 8 months now. No problems with him lying, cheating , etc. Started off great. Going out, spending time with each other. But of recent months the spending time with each other has dwindled. Barely go to cinema, clubs, or any kind of outings. He still drops and picks me up from work, takes me to classes, is still very affectionate and introduces me as his girlfriend. But we go do errands together and that's that!

    He seems to think that with all those things I just mentioned, there is enough time spent with me. During the week he's tired from work, which I get. But every weekend he goes fishing with his buddies in the morning and at nights he goes and plays poker.

    I don't mind him having his friends. But if I ask to go movies or somewhere his response is, "I'm busy," or he has a problem with a place. Ask him for alternatives and his answer is always "home." I feel like

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  • Top 5 Love Lessons from the Bachelor (Juan Pablo, Ep 6)

    Screenshot from ABC's The Bachelor


    1. Everyone has their patented move (e.g. gently curling your date's hair behind their ear). Just make sure your move doesn't become an automatic, robotic gesture when a) you've run out of things to say, b) you're not interested in the words coming out of your date's mouth, and/or c) you've taken a paternalistic view of your dates and are treating them like children whose hairdos - indeed whose whole beings! - need to be tamed.

    2. We said it once, we'll say it again: If you're going to explicitly lay down ground rules and set up boundaries about the way you date - which we are all for (yay, open and honest communication!) - then you've got to follow and respect them consistently. Don't break the rules when it's convenient for you. For example: there is NO moral difference (at least from where we're watching) between getting all hot and heavy in your bathing suits in the ocean and getting all hot and heavy in your bathing suits in a waterfall. Same diff.

    3. If you're going to

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  • 10 Yoga Skills that Will Boost Your Sex Life

    Yoga by SunsetEMandLO.com contributor Alexandra Joy is the author of the new book The Woman's Secret: A Novella with Lessons , which uses storytelling to demonstrate how oriental teachings can transform every aspect of your life. Here she shares 10 ways that yoga can add value to your sexual experiences:

    When I mention to people that I find yoga to be invaluable in my personal life, they typically react with raised eyebrows and knowing Cheshire Cat grins. Yes, yes, I know what they're picturing: The complex, acrobatic sexual positions found in the Kama Sutra. They automatically assume I must be a circus-trained contortionist! In fact, yoga classes can radically improve your sex life in numerous ways, bringing you better, longer, and more frequently occurring orgasms. Here are my top ten favorite ways that yoga skills can boost your sex life:

    1. Focus


    Yogic practices can help you stop thinking about your morning meeting with your client, the designer dress you plan to buy at the end of the

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