Blog Posts by The_Stir

  • The Four Most Awesomely Relevant Lessons My Grandmother Ever Taught Me

    Vintage lessonsVintage lessonsWhen you spend a lot of time around older people, you pick up their quirky little older people mannerisms. And their lingo. And their habits. My Nana was a big influence on me and Girl Child, and like most of her silver-haired compadres, she was distrustful of a lot of newfangled concepts and ideas, so we grew up under the auspices of old-school thinking.

    More from The Stir: Life Advice for My Daughter ... And Myself

    Now that I'm a grown-up and mom myself, I appreciate her teachings more, even though, to borrow one of her own sayings, I've had to learn to "eat the meat and throw away the bones" on some things. I probably haven't worn a slip or a pair of pantyhose since the second Bush administration because I vowed, when I got older, that that would be one of the first of Nana's insistences to go. Most of her old school ways are, well, old-let's call them "vintage"-but they're still effectually relevant.

    Good home training. Manners were a big deal in our house, so if

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  • 'Push Presents' for Going Through Labor & Delivery? Hell, Yeah!

    presentpresentEverything Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi does is a bit over-the-top. The way she dresses, the way she parties, the way she tans. So when I read about fiance Jionni Lavalle possibly getting her a big, blingy "push present" when their little meatball arrives in September, I wasn't exactly surprised.

    More from The Stir: 6 Things I'm Sorry for Thinking Before I Became a Mom

    For those of you unfamiliar with the term, it's a gift some women expect (or demand) for giving birth. It can be as simple as a piece of jewelry or as outrageous as a yacht, depending how deep your pockets reach. It's definitely a controversial subject among many moms. Some think it's a selfish thing to focus on during that time in your life, while others feel like they damn well deserve it.

    I had actually never heard of a push present before I moved to Manhattan. The idea of getting a present for giving birth was foreign to me. But to be fair, so were 24-hour bodegas and a rat population twice that of the

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  • Sex Confession: My Husband Wants to Try Kinky Things & I'm Afraid

    blindfoldblindfold"Sex Confessions" is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, some will turn you on, and some are dark and twisted. You might want to sit down for this.

    Today's sex confession comes from Sue*, a 20-something married mom of one. She says she's in a great marriage, her husband is a terrific dad, and the sex is better than good. Only problem is that her man suddenly has an interest in getting kinky -- the kind of kinky that Sue doesn't think she can get down with. And now she's freaking out wondering where he is getting these wacky ideas and if she should go against her gut and give them a try. Read on to hear more about Sue's conundrum directly from her.

    More from The Stir: 10 Reasons Not to Have Sex on the First Date

    About two months ago my husband decided he wants to have anal sex. We have never had anal sex! I have always been very opposed to the idea of something going into something that

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  • Sleeping on Your Stomach is an Easy Way to Have Sexy Dreams

    kitten sleepingkitten sleepingWanna have sexy dreams? Don't bother with some crazy, dream-programming app, and to hell with aroma therapy candles and or silk lingerie, all you need to do is lie on your stomach. New research out of Hong Kong survey 670 students and found that those who slept on their stomachs had more erotic dreams than the lame-o side and back sleepers. On the flip side, they also reported having more dreams about persecution and being locked up, but shh. Let's just focus on the positive.

    More from The Stir: Dream About Sex With the Help of Your iPhone

    So what's the science behind the stomach sleepers having all the nighttime fun?

    Researchers hypothesize that sleeping on one's stomach constricts airflow to the brain, which can result in a feeling of being restricted. And maybe being restricted, aka restrained, is a turn-on for some sleeping beauties?

    If you've been hearing all about how Fifty Shades of Grey has given your friends incredible dreams, and you have yet to experience

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  • 13 Signs You're in an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

    Emotional abuse may be one of the most subtle and hard-to-understand types of abuse out there. It's a form of abuse where the perpetrator uses fear, humiliation, and/or verbal assault to undermine the self-esteem of the victim.

    Because emotional abuse isn't as clear-cut as physical abuse and is insidious, the scars can last a lifetime.

    Being so close to the situation can make it even more challenging to notice and understand when your partner is being abusive. I mean, we all learned the adage "sticks and stones may break my bones..." Truth is, words can hurt -- very much.

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    Here are some signs you're in an emotionally abusive relationship.

    1) He wants to spend every waking moment with you, and expects you to do the same.

    2) You realize that you now find yourself questioning every move you make - will this set him off? Will that?

    3) If you're worried about setting him

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  • 10 Easy Ways to Boost Your Energy Level

    Do you find yourself yawning right about 4 p.m., exhausted and ready to go home? I do (excepting that I work from home, which complicates matters). Turns out, my energy is exceptionally low because I've been doing all of the wrong things to boost it.

    More from The Stir: A Quick Fix For Feeling Down in the Dumps

    Drinking a pot of coffee or eating a candy bar may help in the short-term, but both caffeine and sugar highs are met with the inevitable crash. So that's not working - what DOES work to bolster your energy level? Turns out it's shockingly easy.

    Here are some easy tips to kick-start your energy!

    1) Get a full night's sleep. That's seven hours of uninterrupted sleep, which, for those of us with small kids, can be challenging.

    2) Ditch the extra poundage by eating less and exercising more. That's not to say you should go on one of those fad diets - they don't work in the long run.

    3) Load up your plate with summertime greens and fruits, rather than

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  • 8 Amazing Fashion Finds that Will Save You Serious Cash (PHOTOS)

    fashion runwayfashion runwayWhat's with designers still jacking up the price tag on every garment they put together? It's still a recession, guys. AKA we ain't got no money to buy that stuff -- didja not get the memo or something? We (and by 'we' I really mean 'me') can't afford all these expensive clothes. Still, a girl loves to shop, know what I'm sayin?

    And I just can't drop cash like Hollywood stars can. So it's like, hey Kim, can I just borrow that Elizabeth and James top? Or at the very least, MK & Ash, can I stand next to it at the store & take a photo with it?

    More from The Stir: 9 Beautiful Stars Who Shouldn't Leave Home Without a Bra (PHOTOS)

    There's a way to solve this designer dilemma though. I could make my own clothing, but hell, who has time for that? Not I! How about ... shopping for the looks I love at safer prices. Hell yeah. Here's how:

    Jimmy Choo vs. Tahari CarlyJimmy Choo vs. Tahari Carly


    Jimmy Choo vs. Tahari Carly

    Would you really want to step out in $300 flats (top)? When it comes to shoes, your best bet is

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  • How to Have Glowing, Gorgeous Skin Without Getting Pregnant (VIDEO)

    Three things I miss about being pregnant: luxurious hair, strong nails, and beautiful, radiant skin.

    We can't help you with the hair or the nails, but in this latest episode of The Sarah James Show, Sarah talks to a dermatologist about how to get that lovely, healthy glow back ... without adding to your family.

    More from The Stir: 3 Easy Steps for Younger-Looking Skin (VIDEO)

    Unsurprisingly, an overall healthy lifestyle is the most important factor in beautiful skin. Exercise, a good diet, and plenty of sleep will all show up on your face.

    Fruits and vegetables, especially those with a lot of Vitamin C like broccoli, or with lycopene, like tomatoes and strawberries, keep your glow going.

    Good fats make a difference too -- think salmon, avocados, and walnuts, all of which are rich in Omega-3 fatty acids, not butter!

    Keeping properly hydrated is also key, as is, surprisingly, caffeine. About a cup of coffee a day can be beneficial to your skin, and topical creams

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  • 8 Simple Ways to Feel Sexy Again After a Divorce

    Divorce -- it happens. Forty-five percent of us who walk down the aisle will wind up later splitting up. And when we do, we may find that our self-esteem -- our entire self-worth -- has been shaken. When I said "'til death do us part," I meant it. But in my life, it's far more important for my soon-to-be ex to be my friend, for us to both find happiness, than it is to stay rooted in one place.

    But the end of a marriage doesn't have to mean the end of your sex appear. So that begs the question: how do you learn to feel sexy again after a divorce?

    1) Change your hairstyle. Cut it, color it, highlight it, whatever you have to do. It SOUNDS cliche, but it really does help to find the new you -- which is something you'll be doing a lot of in the coming weeks and months.

    More from The Stir: Divorce Is Not 'Easier' Than a Good Marriage

    2) Recommit to a workout routine. Sure, maybe you "planned sometime to get around to jogging again," but you lost track of time, got

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  • 5 Deal-Breakers Too Bizarre to Believe

    get outget out

    Not long ago, I read a story about some reality star who said they would kick a guy to the curb if he couldn't sing. It's a total deal-breaker as far as she is concerned. Now, I am all for having standards of some kind. Your man should be what you need and want him to be -- within reason.

    Some requirements just seem utterly ridiculous. I'm not talking about wanting a guy with ambition, family values, a job, teeth. Some things are non-negotiable. Some things, however, shouldn't even be an issue at all. I know someone who won't date anyone who eats mayonnaise. Just the thought of it makes her nauseous. It's crazy to me. I just don't see why a condiment would keep you from a potentially great guy. She's not alone, though. After a completely unscientific poll, I've learned lots of women have wacky rules for prospective mates.

    More from The Stir: 10 Reasons Not to Have Sex on the First Date

    Check out 5 of the most insane deal-breakers you'll ever hear about:

    He Hates

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