Blog Posts by The_Stir

  • The thing is, nobody REALLY tells you about the hemorrhoids. I mean, sure, you might read something in the pregnancy books about swollen blood vessels, but there's nothing that truly prepares you for the day you go to the bathroom and make the Awful Discovery: somehow, you have a tiny balloon protruding from your butt. Possibly there's more than one. Possibly the entire colorful helium-filled cast of Up is suddenly emerging down there, because your body is a precious vessel carrying the miracle of life which apparently includes all sorts of unwanted things peeping out of your asshole.

    More from The Stir: Natural Remedies Safe for All Your Pregnant Ailments

    "Soak your bottom in a warm tub!" the books say. "Apply an ice pack!" What they don't say is 1) putting an ice pack on your sphincter is seriously unpleasant, and 2) things are only going to get worse. Much, MUCH worse.

    The problem is that hemorrhoids are often brought on by having … ah, a Difficult Number Two. Of

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  • Top 10 Baby Name Predictions for 2013

    newbornnewbornBaby names are changing faster than ever. According to Nameberry, the major trends for 2013 draw from the names of Roman gods and the wilder side of nature, tap new international name sources, and include a surprising taste for secrecy.

    More from The Stir: 13 Hottest Baby Names of 2012

    Here are Nameberry's predictions for baby names in 2013.

    1. Superstorm Sandy. There will most likely not be a rash of people naming their superstorm babies Sandy, but statistically we will see a surge of names that pay homage to the devastation, whether it be subconsciously or on purpose. Nameberry predicts names with a Sandy-like sound, such as Alessandra or Cassandra, or Sander. Don't be surprised to see Sand, Dune, Beach, or Storm have risen in popularity. I don't see the draw unless my child was conceived during hurricane Sandy while the power was out. I think it's crazy.

    2. Names from across the pond. Leon has been a top name in Germany and high in Austria, Switzerland,

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  • What's the Right Way for a Divorced Mom to Introduce a New Man to Her Kids?

    Remember that old adage "it takes half the time you were together to get over a breakup"? I do. I also think it's a pile of horse poo.

    Now let me be clear here: I'm in the middle of a divorce and have absolutely no intention of dating for a good long while. I'm enjoying having some time alone, time I can spend rediscovering myself and learning who I am now. After nine years of marriage, I have a lot of rediscovering to do.

    More from The Stir: 10 Signs It's Time to Get A Divorce

    But I still don't think it's going to take me five years to date again. Even though I am a single parent.

    I know the idea of dating a mom who has three wonderful bouncing babies (although they'd murder me with a pickax if I dared call them "babies" to their faces) can be off-putting to a lot of guys. I get that - kids come with an extra layer of complexity and can be a bit messy. But frankly, I consider anyone who doesn't think my kids are awesome unworthy of my time.

    When I do begin to

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  • 11 Signs He Desperately Needs Sex Lessons

    One of the funniest -- and saddest -- break-up stories I ever heard was the friend who broke up with her boyfriend because he couldn't find her clitoris. I mean, it was there. But no matter how much my friend "guided" him to its whereabouts, he'd just as quickly "forget" where it was. Finally, my friend said she drew him a map. An actual map. Because guys like maps. But alas, this guy was not only bad at finding the clitoris, he was bad at reading maps. My friend ended up dumping him. She felt a little guilty, but she honestly couldn't wrap her head around a guy who claimed to care about her pleasure in bed, but couldn't seem to figure out the female anatomy -- and perhaps had no real desire to.

    More from The Stir: 7 Kinds of Sex to Avoid at All Costs

    I'm not saying everyone is should be perfect in the sack -- especially when a partner just getting to know what your likes. But then there's just being selfish, or stubbornly clueless, or just plain bad. Here are 11 signs he

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  • Birth Control Should Be Sold Over the Counter Just like Aspirin

    A doctor's group has recommended that the birth control pill be available over the counter, without a prescription. Hallelujah, I couldn't agree more. Happy dance! When I first started taking the pill, sometime in my mid-20s, it was fairly easy to get -- despite having to go to a doctor, something that, of course, you can really only do with health insurance. Even then, I'd have to call a month or so in advance to get an appointment. And then take an hour or so off of work. But, hey, my Ob-Gyn would write a birth control prescription for me for the whole year. I'd just hop to the pharmacy and get my refill. No problemo. But, for whatever reason, it seems things have gotten more complex lately. You'd think I was trying to get a nuclear warhead.

    More from The Stir: Women Shouldn't Fear IUDs for Birth Control -- Especially Now That They're Free!

    First, the crackdown began on the timing of prescriptions. I noticed a few years ago that if you didn't get your prescription

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  • 5 Delicious Dinner Ideas that Are 180 Degrees from Thanksgiving

    classic margherita pizzaclassic margherita pizzaThis Thanksgiving, I was more than thankful for the delicious, homemade spread my fiance, his mom, and I cooked up. Our local, free-range turkey, organic sweet potato casserole, fresh cranberry and orange relish, organic stuffing, gluten-free pies for the celiacs in the fam, etc. all came out even tastier than we had hoped. But as in most houses, there were lotsa leftovers, which we were perfectly happy to continue feasting on for daaaays as lunch and dinner -- and in some cases, even breakfast! Fast forward to today -- and we are most definitely, 100 percent turkey-ed out!

    More from The Stir: 20 Cozy Crock-Pot Soup Recipes That Cook Themselves

    You probably are too. And hence why it's the perfect time to explore fresh meal ideas that are 180 degrees from Thanksgiving. Because as grateful as we are for them, we could all use a break from our leftovers!

    Asian - A couple of days after Thanksgiving, I started craving anything stir-fried and best cooked in a wok! Nothing

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  • How to Spice Up 5 Classic Board Games for a Super Sexy Date Night

    monopoly boardmonopoly boardBoard games and the bedroom aren't things that normally mix. Sure Strip Poker is a saucy game that can get you in the mood super quick. But that card game is so '80s, isn't it?

    I recently found out about a "mature board game" called Please Me. Its intent is to get couples or groups of friends to enjoy a fun game while exploring all sorts of flirting and... pleasurable experiences. Ahem. Wouldn't a bottle of tequila be much faster and a heckuva lot more fun?

    I haven't played the game, but it got me thinking. (A dangerous pastime, I know!) What if some of the other classic board games put out "mature" editions to help keep things fresh in your relationship? Heck, there'd be dice and spinners flying all over the place!

    More from The Stir: 5 Romantic Ways to Reconnect Other Than Date Night

    So pull up a chair and keep score as I present the 5 Classic Board Games You Can Sexify to Spice Up Your Marriage!

    Twister - There's already tons of videos (uh, I heard from a

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  • Sex Confession: I Had Sex at the Doctor's Office

    heartsheartsSex Confessions" is a series featuring your naughtiest bedroom secrets and fantasies. Some will sound familiar, others may give you ideas, some will turn you on, and some are dark and twisted. You might want to sit down for this.

    Today Maya* is spilling the beans on a naughty little secret she has been keeping. She had sex at the doctor's office. Right there on the examining table! She's married and has a few kids and ... she HAD SEX AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE!? What in the heck was she thinking? I'll tell you what she was thinking ... well, I'll let her tell you and share just who she did the deed with ....

    More from The Stir: 8 Ways to Overcome Issues in the Bedroom & Make Sex Sexy Again

    The kids were all in school and it was time. Time for my neglected body part to get looked at. So off to the doctor I went. That body part? My vagina. The doctor? My husband! Yep, my husband is a doctor and because of his schedule we don't see him that much at home. It's tough on the kids

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  • Potty Train Your Toddler in a Weekend -- it is Possible!

    potty trainingpotty trainingI see that headline: Potty train your toddler in a weekend! And the skeptic in me says, OH REALLY? I don't remember how long exactly it took me to potty train my son. It's been a few years now. I just remember it was more of a process than a couple of days. So when I saw that headline again this morning, "Potty Train Your Toddler in a Weekend," I thought it sounded too good to be true.

    More from The Stir: Potty Training Works When You Break All the Rules

    But when I took a closer look, it actually looked ... realistic! Look, every kid is different and every family's experience is unique. But there are a few basic principles that make the whole potty experience work. Here's what I think works about this approach -- from the vantage point of hindsight.

    1. It's not really "just" a weekend. There's prep work before, and there's followup after, and then it's actually more like a three-day weekend, and results may very. The point is, telling yourself that you can make this

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  • 21 Things Not to Do After a C-Section

    mom babymom babySo you had a c-section. It happens to even the crunchiest mamas among us. Things don't go according to plan, you end up with some severe something, lives are in danger, and cesarean it is. It can be a hard reality for some women, but we can't rewind to do anything differently so we have to press on ... and find some sort of humor in it. Because laughing does help -- though good Grover it's going to hurt like heck if you laugh too hard.

    More from The Stir: A Love Letter to C-Section Moms (That Everyone Should Read)

    Grab a pillow, especially you c-section mamas still in the recovery stage, and hold it softly against your belly because there may be some chuckles here mixed into the list of the things I think you should never ever do after a c-section.

    1. Don't waste 32,446 hours lamenting over the fact you didn't have a vaginal birth.
    2. Don't make the anti-cesarean-no-matter-what crowd get you down. There aren't a lot of them -- they just are loud. Not even midwife
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