Blog Posts by ParentsConnect

  • My Sexy Wardrobe Doesn't Make Me a Bad Mom

    by Sara Wedman for ParentsConnect

    GettyGettyFrom observation at the grocery store and various other outings, I have noticed what I like to call the "Mom Uniform." This uniform includes white tennis shoes, sweatpants, yoga pants or jeans that verge dangerously close to the "mom jean" skit on SNL, a T-shirt of some sort and a baggy jacket. Here's my idea of day-to-day fashion: red heels, dark rinse jeans, a colorful top and my treasured leopard-print trench coat.

    Now, I have no problem with what other women choose to wear, nor do I judge them for it. However, I am writing to defend myself. I often get judgmental glances and snickers and occasionally someone will actually open their mouth to express their disdain with what I am wearing, "You can't possibly wear those shoes with your daughter!"

    So here it goes, this is why I dress the way I do and refuse to give in and dress the way 95% of the moms in my area do. As a woman, I feel that it is very important to not allow motherhood to consume 100%

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  • Be Polite! I'm Pregnant!

    by Sara for ParentsConnect
    Lately, it seems that everyone I come in contact with feels the need to comment on my very well developed pregnant belly (I am nine months along). I am highly irritated and annoyed by both friends and complete strangers who feel the need to share their opinions on my new shape. Is it really any of their business? No, and I'd like to add that I am completely within the healthy pregnancy weight gain guidelines.

    What makes me angriest are the stupid, insensitive and rude comments I have received in the last few weeks. I had no idea people talked like this to others! One of my customers asked me, "You haven't gotten rid of that yet?" I responded rather coldly, "No," since the answer was obvious. Then he asked my due date and said, "Man, you must be having twins, because you are huge if that is just one kid!" Yeah, he actually said that. I turned my chair around so my back was facing him and started typing away. He then proceeded to discuss my weight gain and

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  • I Don't Judge Other Parents ... Anymore

    by Oregonian for ParentsConnect
    I sat there, my sleeping (and still immobile) 4-month old nestled into my chest and stared at my friend Megan in shock. She had just told me that she had enrolled her 18-month old daughter in a Mother's Day Out program at the local community center. I was too busy judging Megan to hear her explain why.

    It's not like we're talking about managing a childcare here, I told myself silently. I mean, sure, it would be nice to have some time to myself, but it's not like it's hard to watch one tiny baby for 40 hours a week. I smugly reminded myself that I would never (really, never) enroll my precious son in any sort of school program until kindergarten and would spend every waking moment as a mother providing him with educational activities that would stimulate his development and challenge his mind.

    Fast forward one year. That tiny, sleeping 4-month old is now 16 months old. A few minutes ago, he carved a path of terror across my house that only a parent of

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  • I'm Raising My Boys to Practice Sexual Self-Control

    Submitted anonymously to ParentsConnect

    People always seem to just assume that adolescent boys have to masturbate. They don't! I have three boys and I know that they don't masturbate. And no, they aren't lying to me.

    It's no big deal if boys have a wet dream or something happens on its own, but the need for self-stimulation is just another one of those lies that parents and kids have been fed under the umbrella of "tolerance"-you know, "don't tell them no" or you might "harm their delicate psyches," etc.

    It's not true. Sex is for marriage, not the shower. (Well, except for in marriage!)

    Is masturbation mandatory? Let us know what you think!

    More from ParentsConnect:

    Talking to Preteens
    About Sex

    Let's NOT Talk
    About Sex

    Backpack Essentials
    for Preteens & Teens

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  • My Mother UN-Potty Trained & UN-Sleep Trained My Daughter in One Weekend!

    by Deva Dalporto for ParentsConnect

    I recently dropped off my daughter at my mom's house for the weekend so I could have a little kid-free time with my hubby. Nice, right? Only my mom managed to completely UN-potty-train and UN-sleep-train my kid in the process. That's right: In the course of two days, my previously well-disciplined 3-year-old was suddenly pooping in her pants and waking up at all hours of the night.

    My daughter been potty-trained for eight whole months, and just like that, my mom flushed all our hard work down the toilet. When I went to pick my daughter up, I overheard my mom actually encouraging her to "just go in the diaper." Um, excuse me, Nonna?! Do you know how many hours, how many soiled pairs of pants and gummy-bear bribes it took to get that kid to do her business in the pot?! Now, it's all gone in a flash. It's been a month and I still can't get Amelie to go in the potty. She actually asks for the diaper, and if I refuse to get her one, she just poops in her

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  • I Don't Like Other People's Kids

    by Kate Tipton for ParentsConnect

    When my girlfriend calls to ask me to babysit her kids, I always silently cringe. It's not that they're holy terrors. They're actually great, well-behaved kids. It's not that I'm busy or otherwise engaged. The truth is, I don't like other people's kids.

    Before I became a mom, I wasn't a big fan of children. I found them loud, mostly smelly, often annoying, dirty little under-your-feet creatures. It wasn't that I could take them or leave them; I could leave them all-in a heartbeat.

    Then I had my own kids and I thought for sure things would change. And they did. I love my own kids to bits. But I'm still not a big fan of other people's. While other people's kids puked, mine merely spit up. Other people's crapped, mine made little poopies. Their kids bawled, mine sounded like little lambs.

    I worry sometimes that I'm missing that part of my heart that's supposed to melt when a kid says something cute or flashes a toothless grin. I mean, who doesn't like

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  • Am I Too Childish To Be a Good Parent?

    by Sherry Richert Belul for ParentsConnect

    Remember what it was like when you were a kid and you and your little brother would sneak into the kitchen to eat chocolate-chip cookies right before dinner? And how the two of you would squabble over the Saturday afternoon family activity; you always wanted to go to the outdoor concerts at the museum and he wanted to stay in the house and watch Star Trek. Can you remember how you'd giggle for hours with your older sister in your room at night when it was way past bedtime?

    Same with me! It's just like that. Except, er ... not with siblings. It's my son and me.

    I don't know when it happened, but sometime between toddlerhood and his current age of 6, we went from being mother and son to brother and sister. We argue over which games to play and where to go. We read together late at night, hours past his bedtime. We both want the last cinnamon roll, the red-not-white gumball, the bigger bowl of popcorn. We even argue in the car over who gets to

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  • Alternative Pain Relief During a Natural Labor & Delivery

    Answered by Summer Fogarty, LMT for ParentsConnect
    What kind of alternative pain relief options do I have if I have a natural birth?

    Labor is a new feeling. It is less scary when you have someone there with you to rub on you and help you relax. Fear of labor creates pain. A massage therapist or doula can help change the atmosphere of the room and the energy of the labor.

    Labor massage helps with labor pain, especially when-during a contraction-a massage therapist or doula spreads the sacrum open to make the contraction bearable. When I do labor massage, I use my thumbs to spread the sacroiliac joints laterally in the lower back lumbar region. This is possible because the hormone relaxin makes the joints looser during the pregnancy; thus, the sacrum joint is relaxed and spreads to make room for the baby. This is one reason why you don't want to stretch out too much toward your due date while doing exercises or yoga.

    In my experience, the best time to get a massage is during active

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  • Hang Up and Parent!

    by Ian Landau for ParentsConnect
    My 4-year old daughter does gymnastics on Saturdays. After class, the kids go to a playroom to wind down. They can't go in without an accompanying adult, and it's always interesting to see how the parents cope with being trapped in the playroom. Some chitchat. Others play with the kids. There are always a few zombies sitting on the floor, backs against the wall. And then there are the ones on their BlackBerrys.

    I know it's an amazing tool, but when you're with your kid in a playroom, that's not the time or place to be getting your "CrackBerry" fix.

    Just the other week I saw a kid throwing sand like a wild man in the sand box. At least four parents were looking around the room going, "Who's this kid's parent?" Finally we spotted him in the corner, furiously typing with his thumbs, eyes glued to his handheld. Enough! It is not OK to check out while you're on parenting duty. It's bad enough when people are on their cell phones! But the BlackBerry is

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  • The Pros and Cons of Co-Sleeping

    Provided by Ann Douglas for ParentsConnect

    While some parents believe that co-sleeping is the most natural way to handle the challenges of nighttime parenting-after all, haven't parents and babies been sleeping together for thousands of years?-others are opposed. Some parents opt out of co-sleeping because they feel that they need some space and privacy in the middle of the night or because they're concerned that sleeping together could be harmful to the baby.

    Other parents express concern about the safety of co-sleeping-and there has been some research to back up those concerns. A study at the Washington University School of Medicine found that bed sharing may increase the risk of suffocation or sleep on a firm, flat mattress, regardless of whether he ends up sleeping in a crib or on your bed. If you sleep on a waterbed or an overly soft mattress, you can't provide your baby with a safe sleeping environment, so co-sleeping is not a reasonable option. But even if your mattress

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