Blog Posts by Refinery29

  • 12 Women Reveal Their Sex Number

    By Kelly Bourdet, Refinery29

    Maybe you can count all of your sexual partners on one hand, maybe you lost count years ago - or maybe, you fall somewhere in the middle. But no matter, that number can often inform how you feel about sex. It can be complicated or simple - or, again, something between the two, often because our relationships with ourselves and our partners change over time, and from partner to partner. Sex can make us feel powerful, but there are also times when it can take away our power. It can be a statement of commitment or a totally no-strings-attached adventure.

    That wealth and range of experience and feeling is a tremendous thing. And, although in the past, women's sexual histories have been used to shame or silence them, things are beginning to change. In many places around the world, women are claiming the expression of their sexuality in big and small ways.

    But, there's still an element of mystery around sex partners - many of us feel uncomfortable with

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  • Porn for Women: A Tasteful Guide to Sexy Time

    Refinery29By Rachel Zar, Refinery29

    Let's face it: Not all porn is created equal. As women, we like it hot, passionate, and even kinky. And, sometimes we also like to watch sex with a little extra attention to female pleasure, perhaps a touch of class, and for sure, approachable actors. If you think there aren't options out there that satisfy your needs, think again. For a few years now, Refinery29 has been listing the best of porn made especially for women (or that we just think women will love!). Whether you're a porn newbie or you've already exhausted our previous lists, you'll want to check out these sites, books, and toys. Enjoy!

    RELATED: 7 True Stories Of One Night Stands

    Websites: is dedicated to celebrating the female orgasm. The site is full of tasteful videos focusing on women pleasuring themselves - and each other. The videos are artsy, and they feature natural women (you'd be hard pressed to find oversized fake boobs here). For the very

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  • How to Have a Better Orgasm Tonight!

    By Rachel Zar, Refinery29

    All orgasms aren't created equal. While some involve life-changing, earthquake-inducing vibrations, others provide only a tiny and forgettable blip of excitement. But, no woman should settle for an orgasm that's less than, well, orgasmic. Ahead, six strategies to take your climax to an out-of-this-world level.


    Be A Little Selfish
    "Having a good orgasm is directly related to the art of receiving - a difficult concept for many women," says sex and relationship therapist Kimberly Sharky, LMFT, CST. "Whether it's directly accepting pleasure or just allowing yourself to not be a giver for a second, the goal is to make your pleasure just as important as your partner's."

    Sharky recommends blindfolding yourself during sex. "If you take away your sense of sight, it gives you permission to pay more attention to what's going on inside your body," she says. And when something happens that you like, speak up. This doesn't necessarily mean handing your partner an

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  • What I Learned when My Boyfriend Made Porn

    Refinery29By Emily Southwood, Refinery29

    Emily Southwood thought she was sexually liberal. That is, until her boyfriend landed a job filming on porn sets. She was forced to combat fears and insecurities she didn't even know she had. What happens when your partner's job requires him to view even the most taboo sex act as a standard day at the office? Ahead, an excerpt from Southwood's Prude: Lessons I Learned When My Fiancé Filmed Porn, where she has a very, ahem, honest conversation about the ubiquity of anal in modern porn. Southwood's book is available from Seal Press, a member of the Perseus Books Group. Copyright 2013.


    We join a line for the concession stand. It's time for a beverage to go with this conversation. "Porn gets so repetitive that they just have to keep penetrating different holes to make a whole film," I say. "Cha cha, ass, eyes, ears . . ."

    "Some women like anal more than you do. Rylie Spence says it's her favorite sexual position. It gives her the most

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  • Does Your Vagina Look "Normal"?

    Refinery29By Rachel Zar, Refinery29

    Women have a bad habit of comparing themselves to other women. Whether it's Heidi Klum's long legs or that co-worker's toned butt, there's always an asset we'd rather have than our own. But, recently, women have gotten increasingly concerned with one body part that's not so easy to compare: the vulva, or the visible part of the vagina. "When I first went into practice in the '90s, I can't think of anyone who came in and said, 'I'm concerned about my labia,'" says Dr. Lauren Streicher, associate clinical professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Northwestern University's medical school. "But, now, a week doesn't go by that a woman doesn't ask me if she looks normal."

    RELATED: Your Boyfriend Is NOT Your Friend

    So, how can a worried woman tell if her vulva measures up? After all, pornography hardly presents a varied demographic, and staring at other women's crotches in the locker room is frowned upon at most gyms. But, according to the experts, if all

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  • 15 Boots (We Love!) All Under $100

    By Marissa Rosenblum, Refinery29

    Just when you thought you'd have to spend a lot of money to get a decent pair of boots this winter, we're tromping on over in our newly found, thrillingly cheap pair of stompers to prove you wrong. Of course, we'd never argue that these $1,200, hand-crafted, colorblocked Pierre Hardy booties aren't a gorgeous, splurge-worthy purchase, but there's always more than enough room in our closets to add some killer under-$100 buys as well.

    So, set in our mission to seek out the best budget-friendly options for you, we spent hours searching high - but mostly low - and put together not 10, not 20, but 33 pairs of buy-me-right-now boots. Shop fast, and you may just have a brand-new set of guilt-free tappers you can show off at every holiday shindig.

    More from Refinery29:
    22 Under-$50 Jewels To Amp Up Your Wardrobe
    How To Dress For YOUR Body Type! 15 Must-Know Tricks
    24 Amazingly Affordable Shoes - All Under $100
    12 Under-$50 Dresses To Show Off Your

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  • 6 Holiday Palettes so Pretty, You'll Fall in Love with Them

    By Gabrielle Korn, Refinery29

    No matter what your current level of holiday excitement is (on a scale of dread to delight), there's one aspect of this oh-so-festive season that consistently wins our hearts: all the pretty palettes, of course. They're sparkly, shimmery, smoky, and vibrant - not to mention professionally and lovingly arranged to satisfy both our eyes and our hearts. What's not to love?

    In our humble opinion, the point of a perfect holiday palette isn't that you're going to wear every single shade at once. Rather, we look for our palettes to inspire us with color pairings we've never thought of and textures we've never tried. And, of course, we want the whole thing to look gorgeous in its case, duh.

    Click through to join us as we ogle the most gorgeous palettes this season has to offer. We're not sure if we want to use them or just rub our faces on them like cats. That's normal, right?

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  • 3 Delish Appetizers, No Cooking Required

    By Erin Phraner, Refinery29

    Now that the turkey coma has worn off, we're about ready to get our holiday-cocktail party on. Too soon? Well, whether you're planning to play hostess or not, it's smart to keep a few quickie appetizer ideas in mind this time of year - you never know when the mood will strike. All three of our easy, no-cook dishes are ready in five minutes and require only five (or fewer) ingredients. So, dust off your sparkly skirt, and pop open some bubbly - you've got a party to throw!

    ..Apple and Blue-Cheese-Butter Crostini
    Give cheese and crackers a party-worthy twist by mixing crumbled blue cheese into salty butter and spreading it on crostini and topping it with apples and honey. Lots of grocery stores sell premade crostini rounds this time of year. Can't find any? Un-toasted baguette slices work just as well.
    .Apple and Blue-Cheese-Butter Crostini
    Give cheese and crackers a party-worthy twist by mixing crumbled blue cheese into salty butter and spreading it on

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  • The 10-Minute Workout is REAL

    By Kristin Booker, Refinery29

    .We have a million excuses for cutting a workout off the calendar: too much work, too far from home, holiday travel, and a marathon Scandal binge before the season cliffhanger.

    Well, lo and behold, we've decided to stop the insanity and get our daily workouts in, even if it's just 10 minutes to focus on building up a sweat. We issued a challenge to the insanely talented (and quite handsome) Will Torres, personal trainer and founder of the private training gym WillSpace, to create a simple, safe, and butt-burning workout that you can do anywhere. The only thing you'll need? A file box with handles that weighs about eight to 10 pounds, some floor space and some sweat-wicking workout gear, because you WILL break a sweat with this workout.

    Ready to stop the excuses? Yeah, so are we. Let's get to work, people, and demonstrate a workout that builds crazy heat, tightens and tones, and torches some serious calories, all in just under 10 minutes flat. The

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  • Shop Cyber Monday at Work — & Keep Your Job, Too

    By Gina Marinelli, Refinery29

    .There are some things we'll sacrifice for landing an amazing shopping deal. But, no, our job is not one of them. And, unless you'd like to cash in on a vacation day this Cyber Monday to scour the interwebs for all of your holiday gifts, you may need an alternate plan of action that won't lead to missed deadlines and a chat with the big boss.

    So, in the sneaky spirit of the season, Mashable has come up with a few clever tricks to cyber shop to your heart's content while on the job. One of our favorite tricks includes camouflaging your desktop - a simple screenshot trick - that's perfect for switching Net-A-Porter to the annual corporate performance spreadsheet in a snap. Of course, other bits of advice are more sensible, like waking up earlier and shopping before work begins. We also suggest skipping your lunchtime errands in exchange for a midday gift-buying spree. All in all, we don't really condone shopping on the job. But, if you really can't miss

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