Like a lot of my Mommy Friends, I'm a Yes Woman.
I want to be everywhere and do everything for everyone. I want to be the first person on your invite list, thought of as a valuable contributor and your general go-to gal. In the prolific words of Cheap Trick, "I want you to want me. I need you to need me. I'd love you to love me."
I don't think I'm alone here. I think we, as women and mothers often times just say yes. Is it habitual? Do we do it because we want to? Do we do it because we think we're expected to? Do we do it instinctively? We work hard and care a great deal; it feels all too often as if everyone wants a piece of us.
I feel as though lately I've been giving myself away to anybody and anything just for the asking. And guess what, I failed to save a piece of myself for myself.
For this reason, I'm learning to say no. Even to things I really wish I could say yes to.
By learning to say no, I'm really learning to say yes. To myself.
Saying no isn't easy (like
Blog Posts by Mommyfriend
I admit it, after I became a mother I became unfairly and unabashedly jaded toward childless people. Not all childless people, just those childless people who incessantly complain they are "so busy" and "so tired" all the time.
I thought I was so busy and so tired all the time before I had kids too, at least I think I did. Then again, my memory of my pre-kid existence is limited to my high school graduation and a piano recital or two. I've always been a mom, I was born a mom or at least that's what it feels like.
Sometimes, when I'm especially busy/tired and I hear a childless person complain, in my head I'm thinking, "You're busy? YOU'RE BUSY?! I work full-time and have 2 kids and homework and cooking and cleaning and errands and…at least at the end of the day your time is your own!" Wow, bitter much? Yuck, that attitude is really ugly and not representative of the person or mother I want to be, like ever. I'm not a mompetitor or a mom one-upper so why do I feel thisRead More »from Supermom is Super Tired
Read More »from It's Not Abuse, It's Daycare
The life of a working mom requires a lot of juggling. And daycare.
I've written about the tiresome mommy wars and made my personal plea to play nice. But a fellow mother must not have read the memo when she graciously provided me with this anti-daycare propaganda link. Good girl gone bad, my fangs came out.
Please allow me to clear up one little thing: It's not abuse, it's daycare.
The website states, "Daycare institutions don't care about or love your child like you do." Damn right and I'm not asking them to. No working mother believes daycare can love their child like they can. I'm paying (not asking) daycare to keep my child safe and enriched for a certain number of hours a day. I'm paying daycare to engage my child in music, art, and socialization. Daycare does these things for me and they do it well because I picked a great one. I did my homework and excuse me, my daycare cares.
The website quotes, "Daycare is a sad place..." - Toy Story 3. Maybe daycare is a sad place FOR A
Fall is here! Pumpkin spice this, cinnamon that, pumpkin patch pictures and of course, Halloween costumes.Read More »from Halloween Costume Hits & Misses--One Mom's Tale
Halloween costumes are either hits or misses. When they're hits, they're big hits and when they're misses, they're catastrophic failures.
I've had my share of both.
Miss: Boy Wonder as a pumpkin, 2002.
Miss: Boy Wonder as a court jester, 2003. Funny how? Like a clown funny? Do I amuse you?
Miss: Boy Wonder as a racecar driver, 2004. You can almost tell what he's about to say.
Hit: Boy Wonder as Thomas, 2005. Toot toot!
Hit: Boy Wonder as Spiderman, 2006.
Hit: Boy Wonder as Venom, 2007.
Miss: Little BooBoo as a pumpkin, 2007. Clearly unhappy with the hand-me-down, clearly I didn't learn the first time.
Hit: Boy Wonder as a stormtrooper, 2008.
Hit: Little BooBoo as Darth Vader, 2008. Because nothing on this earth is funnier than a baby Darth Vader.
Hit: Boy Wonder as Darth Vader, 2009. Boy Wonder, I am your mother (with iffy taste in Halloween costumes).
Miss: Little BooBoo as
I don't have a sister and when I gave first to my first baby, I was the first among my friends to become a mother. I was alone. I was clueless. It was ugly.Read More »from My Online Birth Club: The Sisters I Never Had
Then I discovered my online birth club.
Online birth clubs provide the opportunity to connect with other pregnant women who are due to deliver the same month you are. Club members typically post about their pregnancy joys, fears and everything in between allowing you to compare notes, ask questions and learn from each other. Birth clubs can be joined at any time, regardless of whether you are expecting or have already given birth.
Truthfully, I had reservations about joining a birth club because I'm a little shy with strangers (no, really) and feared outsider branding. I joined my birth club when my eldest was 3 months old because I had very few young mothers to turn to for the support I so desperately needed. To my delight, my birth club members were exceptionally warm and welcoming. The club took tremendous pride in its
Read More »from The Nakey Preggo Pic
What better way to capture the magic of pregnancy than with beautiful maternity photography.
Any amount of research on maternity photography will lead you to the nakey preggo pic, a beautiful and artistic statement about the wonder that is pregnancy. While these typically black and white pictures may range from sweet to sexy, they are almost always really naked.
If you feel like you've got a mad case of déjàvu while reading this post, you're not alone. I've got déjàvu writing it because the nakey preggo pic is the fraternal twin sister of the bare baby bump post. But let it be known that the nakey preggo pic post deserves to stand alone...because it's all nakey and stuff.
I appreciate the beauty of the nude/semi-nude maternity pictures for other Mommy Friends, braver Mommy Friends, like Demi Moore and my beautiful Mommy Friend pictured above.
When personally considering nakey maternity photography, I asked myself the tough questions:
Are my nakey pics supposed to hang above my
Read More »from Do New Moms Deserve Push Presents?
I gave birth to Boy Wonder naturally and I'm here to tell you crowning isn't called "the ring of fire" for nothing. After my tour of delivery duty I jokingly told Big Daddy P I deserved something shiny.
Childbirth is seriously hard work but are moms deserving of a "push present" for the effort?
A "push present" or "push prize" is generally a flashy bauble given by the father to the new mother as a public display of appreciation after labor. Apparently this phenomenon is sweeping maternity wards across the nation and the jewelers (and blingy new mommies) of the world couldn't be happier.
And to think the only push present I ever knew about was a gorgeous new baby.
What are your thoughts on push presents? Did you receive one?
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This is me in 1981, really, really excited about Christmas. For me, Christmas has always been a wondrous time filled with togetherness and magic. My husband felt differently and the mass consumerism of Christmas left him, well…Grinchy. What's more, he couldn't understand how his personal objection dampened the holiday spirit. Just feel the joy dammit!
The above picture is of my husband on our first Christmas, notice how his expression mocked the supposed excitement of the holiday. Obviously unfamiliar with the Christmas joy of 1981, every Grinchy Christmas that followed was commemorated by an annual "excited Christmas picture".
The year our son was born Christmas was different; he was genuinely excited to celebrate our first Christmas as a family! It seemed my Grinch's small heart had grown three sizes that day. While we immortalized Baby's First Christmas with the annual picture, this new daddy finally understood the Christmas joy of 1981.
Today we have 2 sons,
I have managed to stroll one child and hand-hold another while balancing a cake, a purse and a diaper bag...in heels. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I know how to predict and curb a tantrum (hey, it happened once). I am never without a stash of snacks or band-aids. I can fashion a sling out of 2 tube socks in a pinch. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I know my children's health histories, food aversions, fears and hot buttons. I know when snack day, minimum day, share day and pajama day are. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I try to make learning fun, act silly with my kids and accept responsibilities for my failures. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I know how to kill bedtime monsters, get gum out of hair and act as my children's advocate. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I know how to sneak medicine, sneak vegetables and sneak the good Halloween candy for myself. I am exceptional, I am a mother.
I know how to make it all better when no
Read More »from MILF, Love It or Loathe It?
Somewhere along the way, the term "MILF" became not only a socially acceptable compliment but something that required advertising.
I just don't get it.
You know what else I don't get? Why on earth the acronym MILF would ever belong on a onesie.
Something about that is just not right.
Do I want to be a hot mom? Sure I do, so long as I don't have to like exercise or anything to get there.
But really, do I want to be called a MILF? I'm gonna go with not really.
How do you feel about the term MILF?
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