Fashion That Makes Us Sad: $300 Gold Retainer Necklace

Now you can wear your worst middle-school memory hung from your neck and plated in gold! This $300 retainer necklace from Brooklyn designer Kiel Mead takes the ironic jewelry trend to a whole new level.

Though you spent several years in therapy trying to get over embarrassing moments at sleepovers courtesy of this orthodontic torture device, at least you won’t have to worry about losing it now that it’s been conveniently refashioned into a necklace.

$300 might seem like a pretty penny for such a ridiculous item, but when you think of how much your mom paid for your retainer, you might change your mind.

According to the website, this piece “puts a lux spin on dental woes.” We can imagine the only thing it truly does is make you that jerk at the party that’s wearing a retainer necklace as a fashion statement.

If the retainer isn’t weird enough for you, Kiel Mead also makes a $100 necklace with a charm that’s been cast from a piece of already-chewed gum. Yum.

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