Morphine lips: because numb lips are sexy lips

Morphine LipsMorphine LipsUm, Lindsay, you're probably wondering. What is the significance of this highly provocative photo?

Well, ladies, apparently this woman just got finished applying Morphine Lips lip balm, smooching her "victim," and leaving him "in a trance and putty in [her] hands." OBVS.

Yes, that's the promised result of Morphine Lips, a lip balm that makes your lips go numb, as well as the lips of anyone you kiss.

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Morphine LipsMorphine LipsYou can get yourself a tube of your very own Morphine Lips for just $17.50! That's a small price to pay for lip numbing, don't you think?

"There is nothing else like this out there," the website promises. Well, YEAH.

Perhaps I'm missing something here, but um ... why would anyone want their lips to go numb when kissing? Why would that be considered good, beneficial, or SEXAY?

And does this new form of "aphrodisiac" mean that we can expect Morphine Condoms down the pike?

Now THAT would be hilarious! I'd love to see my "victim's" face after trying out a Morphine Condom!

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I also can't help but wonder if a tube of Morphine Lips might come in handy for every mother's purse. I could have really used some Morphine Lips last night on my big toe, when I stepped on a glass splinter in the garage. I can think of no better way to soothe a child's ouchy than to rub a little Morphine Lips on it.

But wait. There's more! According to the Daily Mail:

Morphine Lips' founder, Sheen Moaleman, admitted to Fashionista.com that the original prototype -- which contained 12 percent lidocaine (a local anaesthetic) was so strong it "numbed your whole face."

The mango and peach-flavoured balm that has reached shelves, however, leaves just the lips numb, an effect that lasts approximately five to seven minutes.

Well shoot. If face numbing is out, I'm not so sure I want a tube after all ...

What about you? Would you buy yourself some Morphine Lips?

Written by Lindsay Ferrier for CafeMom's blog, The Stir.

Images via Morphine Lips

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