New guy thing we don't get: Morphsuits

Photo by: https://www.facebook.com/Morphsuits
A morphsuited guy posted his office-casual look on Facebook-
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Thu, Oct 6, 2011 4:45 PM EDT


To be filed along with Pimp Halloween costumes and Ultimate Fighting, Morphsuits are the latest trend to tap a nerve with the penis-carriers of the world. For the rest of us, it's baffling.



Already a phenomenon in the UK, guys are wearing these full body suits to sporting events in the colors of their favorite teams. It hit the Philly area after a character in the show "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" adopted the green suit as a look. Now it's an emblem of pride for Philly Eagles and Canadian hockey fans alike. But it doesn't stop there.



The head-to-toe body suits are being worn to parties, local events and trips to the supermarket. Proof is on the Morphsuits Facebook page, where users around the world post photos in their get-ups.



We don't get it. It seems high-maintenance. There's no pockets (although the company is selling attachable fanny packs for your suit). You can see out of them, but probably through a haze of neon. Although the website makes abundantly clear that you can drink with the suits on, through the micro-holes over your completely covered face, going to the bathroom is far from easy. You have to take the whole thing off. Also dressing in one big neon legging is hardly a flattering look if you're not built like The Situation. And if you're looking to get laid, it helps to show your face. And not frighten small children.



Nonetheless, it's a guy thing. Here are a few female hypotheses of why: It's a no-brainer when it comes to getting dressed. No deliberating over matching ties with shirts and pants. Also it's comfortable. And there has to be something to the simultaneous anonymity and attention it provides. You can be the life of the party and make a total fool of yourself, and no one has to know it's even you. And if you find yourself in a situation where everyone's in a Morphsuit, you can up the ante, with a "premium" suit that comes in designs like the American Flag." As disturbingly futuristic as it may seem, it's a lot simpler than the complicated outfits we women create daily. Oh and for the well-endowed, it's a good showcase for the package.



So maybe there's something to it? Help us out, guys.