I am not a traditional Catholic. I live with my boyfriend, I believe in gay rights, I take birth control, and I don't go to Church regularly. I have been told these are all sins. So how could I possibly consider myself a Catholic? Because I have faith that is unending. My grandmother raised my mother, who in turn raised me, to never lose my faith in God. Through the many trials I've experienced in my 20s, I've never forgotten that lesson. In the last five years, I've had three surgeries, three concussions, job dependability issues, and money problems that have all just been the tip of the iceberg. Many Catholics would have turned to the church, I turned to my angels.
I have had three grandparents pass away, my grandfather when I was only five and more recently both of my grandmothers (another set of challenges from my 20s). There is not a day that has gone by since I have become an adult that I do not talk to my angels. I spend time every single day thanking God for the things he's given me and praying for the major things in my life. I spend even more time talking to my grandparents, mostly my grandmothers because I was close to them both, asking for guidance in my life. This constant reminder of love from my angels above helps me remember to believe in my faith no matter how difficult the hurdle.
My ChurchFor some people, church is where they feel closest to God. But again, I'm not the typical Catholic. The place I feel closest to God is in my heart when I go somewhere quiet and just talk, cry, or sometimes scream. I feel when I talk to God and my angels, that's when I really feel them and begin to understand their lessons. When I am done my heart feels full, probably like most do when they leave church. I've tried attending church regularly, but ultimately I feel closest to my faith after my own version of church.
Everyone has their own way of experiencing faith. True Catholics don't judge. People may think I'm not a true Catholic because I'm not traditional, but I know in my heart I am. I know that God and my angels love and believe in me. I feel it everyday.