A Golden Door to Change
On April 1 st , I arrived at the Golden Door in Escondido, CA, with an open heart and mind. I turned 31 on March 29 th , just a few days before my stay. Happy birthday to me, right!? It was surreal to pull up to the modest gate and have this Eden of peaceful enlightenment open up to me: Shannon Nolan.
Here is my story in a very brief nutshell: I am educated, I travel, I have friends and a loving family, and I make a comfortable living. My successes in life are largely due to the skills I learned from my parents, despite my all too brief time with them on this earth.
Dad died when I was 21 from cancer and mom died 10 months after from "complications from morbid obesity". Dad was 55 and mom was 56. I know how depressing this sounds but let me tell you that God, the Universe, Spirit, or as I like to say, Beloved Friend has redeemed these tragedies and losses in my life in many ways which were illuminated during my week at the Golden Door.
One of the grandest blessings was getting to know the staff and management. From greeter to general manager, each person was authentically nice and thoughtful. I was provided with extra large robes (which I'm sure they had to hunt for), and when management heard that I enjoy evening swims, they left the pool uncovered until 9pm.
Staff members wear golden name badges which include their name, occupation and years of service. Many have been there 10, 20 even 50 years! Yes - 5-0 years! (That would be Ms. Rachel Caldwell, the GM who looks around 50 years old -seriously. Have you ever heard of such retention? As a whole these folks embody the essence of love. They are all glowing from good health, loving what they do, and believing in the magical process that happens for their guests. Feeling this immediately, I knew that this stay would be exactly what my spirit needed.
I have tried every diet to address my weight loss: I've porked out with Atkins, packed sand with South Beach, I even did a liquid diet for a YEAR which helped me drop and keep off 100 lbs., but I have never approached my "weight issue" as a spiritual, emotional, and mental balancing. I learned many things about myself during my stay and one of them was that I have been a controlling person most of my life. But the irony here is that my need to control has resulted in my health/wellbeing becoming out of control. I've tried controlling the people around me specifically trying to "fix" things so that they "feel better," like me more or just feel that I'm the best thing since sliced bread. My sense of purpose has long been focused on the external world validating me so that I have a sense of purpose. This is called codependency. For this I am cured and done with after wishing and praying, trying and doing drastic things to release it.
The true release was so simple - it came in surrender. Reinforced with love from my angels on this side and the otherside and completely embraced at the Golden Door. The Golden Door was my golden opportunity to be surrounded by GOD in every way shape and form. GOD was everywhere - and for the first time I really slowed down to connect with Him inside of me. Call it Holy Spirit, true self, or whatever you'd like. Again, I call my Creator Beloved Friend and for the first time I'm starting to be a friend to myself.
