Would You Do This to Your Vagina?
Lately, there've been a lot of new va-jay-jay trends for women who, uh, think outside the box. Some could be appealing, but some are so ridiculous, you'll swear we made them up. Sadly, we didn't.
By Mina Azodi
1. V Bling
When we first heard about vajazzling, we thought it had to be a joke - a bedazzled hoo-ha seems more like an SNL skit than a sexy new trend. And now suddenly, it's everywhere. Even Jennifer Love Hewitt professed her love for the sparkle during an interview on The George Lopez Show, saying it's like a "little disco ball down there." TMI? Probably. But we wanted to know what the fuss is about, so we asked Cindy Barshop, founder of the Completely Bare Spa, in New York City, one of the first to offer jeweled waxes. "Now that the Brazilian is mainstream, women want new ways to make the area special," says Barshop. When you get vajazzled, you can choose from patterns like a flower or a heart, or ask for a custom design. The crystals have an adhesive on the back of them and last five days. Barshop estimates 15 percent of the spa's customers request bedazzling after a wax…and its popularity has created demand for more designer Brazilians. In fact, Completely Bare recently rolled out bikini ink, which are temporary vag tattoos (they last five days too). Soon, they'll even offer glow-in-the-dark tats. Huh? Well, that would make it easier for a guy to find your hot spots.
Related: Everything You Need to Know About Your Vagina
2. V Hairstyle
While some women are getting rid of all their downthere hair and decorating their vag, another movement of chicks is simultaneously embracing the natural look - more specifically, supermodels like Kate Moss, who showed off her pubic hair (albeit trimmed) in a recent nude photo shoot for a European magazine. These days, for each woman who goes bare, there's another who bucks the total-Brazilian trend. "Leaving some hair is their way of trying something new," explains Barshop. "Since more women tend to be completely bare, it can be more shocking to keep some of the hair." Hey, to each her own. If you feel like it, we say let it grow.
Related: Body Clues You Should Never Ignore
3. V Fitness
Introducing the PantyO, underwear that supposedly exercises your kegel muscles as you wear it. Um, we're pretty sure they've already invented a workout for that, and it's called sex. But here's how the PantyO works: Sewn into the crotch of each pair is a 1-inch ex tension, which is inserted vaginally while wearing the underwear. Squeezing it is supposed to strengthen your vag so you'll be more orgasmic. Really? "Kegel exercises may improve climax, but inserting something in your vagina likely won't result in an extra benefit," says Raquel Arias, MD, associate professor of ob-gyn at the Keck School of Medicine at the University of Southern California. And since the PantyO costs $125, we say skip the undies and do kegels the old-fashioned way.
Related: Questions You Forgot to Ask the Gyno
4. V Makeup
Apparently, blush isn't just for your cheeks any more. Now there's My New Pink Button, a temporary dye that promises to restore the "pink" to your cooch (the tissue of the labia loses pigment with age). It comes in four different shades: Marilyn, Bettie, Audry, and Ginger. Not sure which color to choose? They offer helpful descriptors, like this one for Bettie: "Think of th at favorite lipstick you wear for those black-tie affairs." WTF? But here's the thing : No one but your gyno would ever be able to detect a difference. "In fact, if you dyed your labia with a product like this and came into your gynecologist, your doctor would likely mistake the color change as a symptom of a variety of diseases," says Dr. Arias. Not exactly hot. Plus, it's possible the dye will irritate the area. "I certainly would not recommend it," says Dr. Arias. "There's no sense in taking a healthy vulva and dyeing it when the original, natural color was better to start with."
Related: A Shocking STD Statistic
5. V Accessories
Wow. We can't believe these wacky products actually exist - who knew the vagina could be so high-maintenance? For the fashionista vag, there's Pantzies, "the one and only superior designer pantie liner" that comes in regular and hot pink leopard print, "so you can look and feel fabulous." Right. Because during your period, you really want to look down and see a leopard-print pad. And what if you have camel toe? The Cuchini (no, it's not a pasta dish) promises to come to the rescue. It's a pad you stick to your underwear to "smooth the ridges of the mons pubis." You could do that…or you could just wear pants with a wee bit more wiggle room.
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