10 rules for having a one-night stand

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For those of you who voted in favor of one-night stands yesterday, here's a little refresher course on how to make said one-night stands as nice as possible, in every sense of the word. Just because you're never going to see someone again, doesn't mean you can treat them unkindly. Because if today we're rude to our one-night stands, tomorrow we'll stop holding elevators for strangers in a hurry, and by the weekend we'll be answering our cellphones in church. So here are ten good rules to follow:

1. Always lay your cards on the table before the strip poker begins--we like to call this the "pre-nook." Confirm that your date for the evening has no delusions of grandeur about a future together. Too many people out there--including, yes, some men--think that when you sleep with them, it means you care. The responsible cad or cadette weeds these persons out of the mix by being up front about his or her intentions.*

2. That said, it's just plain rude to beat off a dead horse. Let's say you have a one-night stand and the conversation is stimulating and the sex even more so. Let's say your bedmate suggests doing it again sometime as they head for the door. It would be a bit of a slap in the face to begin hyperventilating and gasp, between breaths, "I...am...not...looking...for...a relationship." Plus, they might make a good booty call! (Have the prefect booty call in 25 Steps!)

3. Conversation should be kept light and airy; avoid the subjects of life goals and family dysfunction.

4. However, this is most definitely not an excuse to avoid the safer sex conversation. Hey, if you followed rule #1, you've already established that you're going to do it, so it's not like it'll seem presumptuous to discuss latex and STDs. (Here's some advice on how to bring up your STDs.)

5. A thick foreign accent is a perfect accessory to a one-night stand. In particular, people whose native language is of the Romantic variety make ideal partners. But don't even think about faking a foreign accent in order to get laid.

Find one-night stand steps 6-10 here!