I've Seen One Minute of Online Dating Rituals of the American Male, and I'm Already Scared

by Gena Kaufman


Getty Images
Getty Images

Online dating is so confusing that there isn't a woman who's tried it and hasn't wondered what in the world is going on in the minds of the men they interact with. Hence, Bravo's upcoming reality show, Online Dating Rituals of the American Male, seems like automatic must-see-TV.


Here's the network's description:

Bravo Media unmasks the world of the booming online dating culture from the male perspective on the new docu-series, Online Dating Rituals of the American Male. Each week, the show follows two men as they hunt for their ideal partner (or fling!). Viewers will get an inside look at the male psyche from the beginning stages of trolling and communicating online to landing a date with a potential match. The series features a variety of men from the typical "romantic" searching for his one true love to the guy whose goal is strictly getting lucky. From earnest romance to cringe-worthy moments, viewers will get a taste of the trials and tribulations that come along with dating in the digital age.

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There's no way I'm not going to tune in when this airs in March, but based on the first promo (see it at bravotv.com; it doesn't appear to be embeddable)…I'm starting to think maybe I don't wanna know what guys are actually thinking during this process. Here are a few of the things said in the short glimpse we got into the show…

…ranging from the totally rude and blond-ist…

"If she's a brunette, the best she could be is an 8."


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…to the TMI…

"Online dating: It can happen in the boardroom, it can happen when at home in the bathroom. Sometimes you find love in the sh*ttiest places." (It should also be unhappily noted that this quote was interrupted by a clip of two dudes huddled over a computer, one wincing, "Ooh, she's 31.")

to the things that make you say, "Um, don't send those to ME either, please!"...

"I'm sending out so many messages, I gotta be very careful not to be sending d*ck pics to some dude in Toronto."

Eep! I did giggle at the guy who exclaimed, "Holy gingersnap, Batman!" though.

Are you curious to see this show and get the male perspective on online dating?

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