Wishing your sex life was a little more exciting? Follow these moves inspired by Fifty Shades of Grey to add some oomph to your orgasm. By Cari Wira Dineen, REDBOOK.
Getty ImagesFifty Shades of Grey has women talking-and thinking-a lot more about sex. But, it also has many of us feeling inferior. A recent Goodinbed.com poll found that 50 percent of people are bored in their relationships, and crave more sexual adventure. So how can you turn your love life into the stuff of fantasy literature, even if your idea of a "playroom" houses your kids' toys? Read on for 10 moves you'll want to try ASAP. Feel free to forward them to your guy to get his wheels spinning...
The best place to start: with Christian and Ana themselves. Ian Kerner, founder of Good in Bed and author of the new book, The Big Book of Sex, suggests reading your partner a passage of Fifty Shades of Grey, or another piece of erotic literature that turns you on. Although going beyond missionary position might push you both out of your comfort zones initially, it could ultimately put you into a better place as a couple-so long as you agree on a safe-word beforehand. "By experiencing [these] together, they help build trust and enhance intimacy in your relationship," says Kerner.
Related: 6 Old Marriage DON'Ts and DOs
Tying one on
The fantasy of submission and domination is very popular, says Kerner, and not just because of Fifty Shades of Grey. Women are more often than ever working in positions of power and are used to caring for the house, so it's not surprising a take-charge attitude might be attractive in a partner. "The idea of being taken and submitting to authority and not having to make the decisions can be very appealing," says Kerner.
Don't have any handcuffs handy (um, us either)? Take a cue from Mr. Grey and have your husband use one of his ties to bind your hands or affix them to the bed, or do the same to him with one of your scarves.
"By minimizing one sense (sight), you potentially enhance your other senses, such as touch," explains Kerner. Blindfolding can also spur your imagination. The person who can see should have some surprises at the ready (a feather tickler, an ice cube, or a vibrator, for example) to stimulate other senses and to create a build-up to intercourse.
Related: The Most Iconic Kisses of All Time
Feel the freeze
Our skin is our biggest sex organ and stimulating it can enhance pleasure or even lead to orgasm, says Kerner. Rubbing ice cubes on your partner's skin creates a sexual jolt-a sensation that can be uncomfortable, but not exactly painful. "It's exciting because you can submit to someone without experiencing actual pain," says Kerner. Bonus tip: Put ice cubes in your mouth before performing oral sex to really heat things up.
Ana inserts Ben Wa balls before going to out to dinner with Christian and every time she moves, they build her desire. Sounds sexy, but it's not exactly realistic for most of us. Something we all can do? Spend more time on foreplay-without or without toys. "Foreplay actually can open you and your partner up to a deeper sexual intimacy because it makes sex more about fun and less about just achieving orgasm," says Kerner. You can also "forget" to wear your panties on your next date night, and casually mention it to your guy once you're out. Foreplay? All figured out.
Related: Foreplay Tips: The Moves Men Love
Do it everywhere- but bed
One of the first and most exhilarating sex scenes was when Christian takes Ana on his office desk. While few of us have desks or tables that can hold the weight of two people (plus we don't have Mrs. Jones to clean up after us), the idea here is less about doing it on a desk and more about acting on your sexual impulses. If you're alone in the house, make your move when and where you feel like it. Pull your guy into the coat closet for a passionate kiss, or shove him up against the wall for good groping. "A quickie doesn't have to be full-on intercourse or lead to an orgasm," says Kerner. "In fact, it's better if it builds physical and psychological anticipation that can lead to hotter sex later."
For more ways to spice up your sex life, visit Redbookmag.com.
More from REDBOOK:
9 Health Risks That Aren't Worth Taking
How to Dress Sexy
10 Ugly Truths About the Male Mind
5 Tricks to Make Cellulite Disappear
- 19 Tiny Ways to Make Life Happier, Saner, and Sweeter