8 Sex and Dating Topics We Hope to Never Ever Hear About in 2014

by Gena Kaufman

Getty ImagesGetty ImagesIn the grand tradition of noting the good and the bad of the past year, we have to acknowledge that along with all the lovely, romantic things that happened in 2013, there were some real groaners as well. Here, we discuss the eight things we're really hoping not to hear more about in 2014.


Catfishing. No, this topic wasn't invented in 2013, but the year did bring the most bizarrely confusing case of a faked online identity we've ever heard of, courtesy of college football player Manti Te'o. Frankly, we're still not sure what happened there, but it made us feel so weird, we'd rather not see it happen again.

Funky uses for, uh, spunk. Look, bodily fluids are natural and a part of sex, and that's fine. But please, let's keep them out of our drink recipes and our gifts from secret admirers.

Single shame. It's bad enough that we learned that being single could literally cost you an extra $1 million over a lifetime. We don't need a lecture about how we're past our prime by our sophomore year of college from any more Princeton moms, mmkay? Please stay a joke of '13.

Epic, viral breakups. Really, people, it's not going to make you feel better in the long run to post a dramatically staged revenge scheme on the Internet post-breakup, and we don't want to hear about them anymore.

Gross beds. Hey, dudes. Wash your sheets more in 2014. That's all.

Insecure men. Sadly, a study revealed that men suffer bruised egos and low self-esteem when their woman is successful. In 2013, not 1913. So pretty please, can we make 2014 the year when both men and women are allowed to feel good about each other's successes? That sounds so much happier for everyone.

Overused phrases in online dating. We know. You have eclectic taste in music, you never have a typical Friday night, and you're just as comfortable in sweats as you are in a suit. It's nice to have some common ties that bind us all, but in the new year, let's maybe point out a few things that make you unique.

Eyeball licking. We can't believe we have to put this on the list, but this one-way ticket to Pinkeye Town was a teenager trend this year. We'd all like to avoid adding new "bases" that make us throw up our breakfast next year.

What would you add to the list?


More from Glamour:
The Best Celeb Haircut for Your Texture
10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own