What It’s like to Be in a Three-Way Relationship (aka a “Throuple”)

How do you start a three person relationship?How do you start a three person relationship?
By Chiara Atik for HowAboutWe


This weekend I found out that one of my friends was up until very recently in a "throuple." A throuple, for those of you who don't know, is a three-way relationship. Like, three people date each other. I know. I basically couldn't have been clutching my pearls any harder. Anyway, my friend agreed to let me ask her some questions on being in a throuple for the blog, as long as I kept it anonymous because, "it's a sensitive issue."

First of all....what? How do you start a three person relationship?
It was actually a total accident. I started dating this guy who had gone on a some dates with this girl a few weeks prior, and she decided she wasn't really into him that way, but they could be friends. They stayed friends, he introduced us at a party... and as it turns out she was more into me than she was into him.I was really into him, I was pretty into her, and the next thing I knew the three of us were doing things like going out to dinner together, getting drinks together, going to parties together, and um... well doing other fun things together. They never would've been a thing independently if I hadn't come along. I'm not sure if it were a covalent bond or an ionic bond (if we're talking science speak here), but I was definitely the electron being shared. Maybe more ionic... I hung out with them separately also.

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Did it ever feel like someone was a third wheel? Yeah. At one point it did. We had a lot of fun together, but at the end of the day, I really liked him and had barely gotten to know him on his own before the three of us were together all the time. He and I were definitely the couple that was basically dating her at the same time, and there was a point where the two of us would try to plan a date and feel bad not inviting her, but at the same time felt like we needed to be alone. It got a little frustrating for me.

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But she liked you, not him?? Yeah. It was kind of funny to me that she ended up being more into me than this guy that she had gone on dates with alone... and because of this, he basically did end up getting to date her. The throuple itself ended up fading out, and he and I continued to date (just the two of us). But after he and I broke up, I heard he had tried to hook up with her on his own and she said no. She and I have actually hung out since then and still make out and such. What can I say, we had a connection as soon as we were introduced.
Would you do a throuple again?
Totally. But I think if I do, whether it happens accidentally, I need to not fall in love with one of the parties involved. That's when it gets tricky. But if it's all a mutual thing, and everyone is having a good time, then why not.

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Last question....all three? In one bed? Because that's what happens in like, movies, and I just need to confirm that's how it is in real life.

Hahaha. yes. That's how it works in real life. We probably could've used a bigger bed though.