“Your Place or Mine?” the Pros and Cons of Where to Spend the Night
By Chiara Atik for
HowAboutWe
Look, if we could all spend our dating lives having sex in hotels, we would: swank, cushy,neutralrooms that you can just leave at the end of the night. With room service. And robes. And little bottles of shampoo you can take home.
Unfortunately, life is not a vacation at a 5 star hotel, and when it comes to choosing where to spend the night with your lover, you're usually left with two options: your place, or theirs.
So, which to choose? There are pros and cons to both, obviously. Read our list, and then take the poll to help us decide which is better place to spend the night: Yours, or theirs?
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YOUR PLACE:
Pros:
Definite home-court advantage. When having someone over at your house, you know where everything is, you know where you are, you feel at home because, well. You are at home.
You know for sure when the sheets were last washed.
You won't have to go without contact solution, change of clothes, medicine, or whatever else you might need.
Afterwards, your pillow will smell like him or her, which can be a good thing, if you really liked them.
No walk of shame!
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Cons:
No casually slipping out the next morning.
Hard to get him or her to leave in a tactful manner, without making some excuse about your parents visiting.
If you weren't expecting an overnight guest, there might be some embarrassing stuff in your room.
They will forever know where you live. And, like, hopefully you aren't dating serial killers, but nevertheless, it's hard to keep any veil of anonymity once they've been to your house.
Afterwards, your pillow will smell like him or her, which can be a bad thing, if you immediately regret the whole thing.
Your room is sort of…sacred. It's yours, it's where you go to get away from it all. Someone would really have to prove his or herself before being invited there.
Related: 10 Things Women Ask Themselves Before Sex
HIS PLACE:
Pros:
You get to see where they live! This is hugely interesting and valuable information, obviously. Dating will turn anyone into an anthropologist. Poke around!
Sometimes it's nice to not play host. Like, they're the ones who are going to have to dig around for an extra towel or clean tshirt for you to wear or whatever. You can just relax.
It is possible, of course, that their place is nicer than yours.
Sometimes, for whatever reason, it's easier to sort of…let go? When you aren't at your house, surrounded by your things.
You're in control off when you leave. The second you're over it, you're out of there.
Sometimes your roommates appreciate the break.
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Cons:
It's just really, really hard to sleep in someone else's bed, with someone else in it.
Running into their roommates, if they have any, is awkward.
It is possible, of course, that their place is a sh*thole, and you curse yourself for not just going back to yours.
You can leave whenever, provided you know exactly where you are. Wandering around a strange neighborhood at night, or trying to call a cab when you have no idea where you are, can be a nightmare.
You don't have any of your stuff.
Walking home the next morning. Sometimes, it's not even about the shame: you're just tired.
