Anna Breslaw, Glamour magazine
Can someone tell me where I can get arrested for having sex with someone inside a giant block of cheese? Because that implies that there would be men in that location who are willing to have sex with me inside a giant block of cheese.
You may think you're a law-abiding American, but I bet you've broken at least one of these local laws. Even something as innocuous as getting undressed for bed in front of a man's picture could get you thrown in the slammer in Oxford, Ohio!
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I propose a Smitten road trip to each of the below locations, breaking laws as we go. It'll be just like Superbad, you guys!
According to Peace FM Online:
- In Tremonton, Utah, women aren't allowed to get frisky in the back of an ambulance without being slapped with a sexual misdemeanor charge. Interestingly, there is no such law for men.
- Arizona, Florida, Idaho, Indiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi, Nebraska, Nevada, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Vermont, Wisconsin and Washington, D.C. prohibit erections that are visible under clothing in public. However, there's not enough room in penitentiaries to accommodate every 7th grade boy in Indiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi, Nebraska, Nevada, New York, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Vermont, Wisconsin and Washington, D.C., so...
- In Alexandria, Minnesota, a man isn't allowed to have sex with his wife immediately after eating garlic, onions, or sardines.
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And some additional bizarre laws from Sodomy.org (best URL ever!):
- In Ames, Iowa, after a guy has sex with you and you're lying in bed together, he's not allowed to take more than three sips of beer.
- Bozeman, Montana prohibits all sexual activity on the front lawn of a house after sundown, but only in the nude, which means throw on some socks and you won't get arrested.
- Connorsville, Wisconsin prohibits a man shooting off his gun while his female partner is having an orgasm.
- My personal favorite: In Florida it is illegal for single, divorced, or widowed women to parachute on Sunday afternoons.
- It's illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man's picture in Oxford, Ohio.
- In Willowdale, Oregon no man may curse while having sex with his wife.
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How zany are these outdated laws? For that matter, how many of 'em have you broken? Want to have sex with me inside a giant block of cheese? OK, I was just testing you.
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