Are Guys More Freaked Out Over Sex Than We Are?
I was still in my pajamas this morning (don't ask what time) when I turned on the computer to find it was National Unmarried and Single Americans Week.
Who knew? But apparently September 19 to 25 has been set aside to honor the more than 100,000 adult solo citizens of this country. It occurred to me that such an occasion should be acknowledged. So after watching an old episode of The Match Off, (that NBC show where two pros vie to fix up a picky single), I called one of the dating experts on it, Rachel Canis. She was actually the loser, but I don't know... I like her shoes theory: "Make sure you can walk in them. I don't care how old you are."
That POV, it turns out, goes nicely with the name of her high-end dating service, Best Foot Forward, in Chicago. In any case, it was Canis, who told me she'd interviewed 500 of the windy city's singles this year and discovered a surprising new trend. When couples first have sex, according to her research, women take it in stride; it's the guys who freak out. They overanalyze. They worry what it all means. They feel the air thinning and turn into Carrie Bradshaw on a mountaintop doing a one-night-stand postmortem.
What happened to all that sowing of wild oats?
"We found that men were over-thinking it more than women," Canis says. "Some guys don't, but a certain percentage of them assume that after sex, the woman is already picking out china patterns, and they worry there's a new obligation. Ironically, for most the ladies we interviewed, sex was just part of the dating process to see where things were going."
Canis went on to say that men even flip out if the woman thanks them for date (Oh boy, "I Love Lucy" just turned into Lucy the hominid.) "I'd think it was common courtesy to send a text if you had a really good time," she admitted, "but for some reason it makes men feel more pressured. I find that men still want to control the pace of the relationship."
Hey ladies, what do you think? Is it true that men are freaking out more about sex than women? Take our poll.
For more on sex and dating...
How Soon is Too Soon to Have Sex?
The Great Female Shine Survey
Why Guys Are Not Approaching You
[Photo credit: Thinkstock]
