Ask Dr. Kate: I bleed during sex. How do I to stop this from happening?

Dear Dr. Kate,

I have been sexually active for about 6 years now. Today me and my man had sex and I started bleeding during it. I think it might have been caused by the sex position--doggie style--because I also had the same problem with one of my exes. It seems like when we try that position it hurts more than usual--obviously not one of my favorites but it's one of his. How can I enjoy this position more without bleeding? Will this bleeding go away?

Bleeding From Behind

Dear Bleeding,

The position alone shouldn't cause bleeding, though that position can cause discomfort (from him hitting your cervix with the deeper penetration). So I think there's two issues...I think you should see your gyno to make sure that your pap smear is fine and that you have no vaginal/cervical infections (the most common causes of bleeding with intercourse). But the pain issue is a separate one. You don't have to try ANY position that makes you uncomfortable--or worse, in pain - no matter how much your boyfriend enjoys it. But if you want to try to make the position more comfortable, here are some things to think about...

  • For such deep penetration, you'll want to be fully aroused, so there's literally more room in your vagina for your boyfriend to be. Make sure you get plenty of foreplay first, or consider starting intercourse in a different position then switching. (How to be completely aroused for your partner.)

  • He can enter you from behind in several ways - not just with you on your knees, but both of you lying on your side, which you may find more comfortable.

  • An advantage of rear entry is that it allows him to directly stimulate your clit with his hands or a vibrator during intercourse (or allows you to touch yourself) - and the more aroused you are, the more likely you are to truly enjoy this position (and of course, sex in general).

Do any of you have pain with certain sex positions?

Related: 10 sex questions every woman should ask herself.

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