Bacon-Flavored Lube Promises to Add 'Sizzle' to Your Sex Life
Really ... I'm not sure what's wrong with some people. But there are actually individuals out there who love bacon so much that they petitioned, begged, and pleaded for J & D's, the purveyors of bacon-flavored salt and bacon-flavored lip balm, to come out with bacon-flavored ... lubricant. Eww. Eww. Ewwww. Yeah, the idea originated from an April Fools' blog post that was a tongue-in-cheek, satirical JOKE. But when some pork lovahs out there caught wind of the concept, they actually made a case for J & D's to produce the stuff.
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So, now, it exists. And for $11.99 you can buy yourself a bottle of baconlube Massage Oil and Personal Lubricant. Wow -- SO UNKOSHER.
Perhaps I just don't understand, because I have never and really will never care for pork, red meat, and especially what the USDA defines as "cured belly of swine carcass." (Blleechhh.) But come on, even people who DO love it have to admit, bringing it into bed and incorporating it into your sex routine? How on earth is that hot?! I could see certain other, unconventional flavors being good in bed ... like creme brulee or even something a bit quirky like Sour Patch Kids, but bacon?!
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Oh, well! The freakiest thing to me is that I bet there are even more people who are going to be into this than the "baconlube" (that's the trademark spelling, FYI) makers expect. And then they're going to have to make all different kinds of haute gourmet flavors, like bacon with chocolate lube, maple bacon cupcake lube, or bacon and pancakes lube!
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Well, alright, you know ... when it comes to sex and turn-ons, to each their own, right? Who am I to judge? The folks behind the lube won't wrinkle their nose at you either. They say, "We'll make no judgments about why you want this or what you want to do with it, but baconlube is here ... Keep It Sizzlin'." HA! Okay, cool, whatever floats your boat. And if that's having meaty, bacon-flavored sex, so be it.
Wha do you think about baconlube?
Image via baconlube.com
Written by Maressa Brown on CafeMom's blog, The Stir.
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