Be Your Own Valentine

Valentine's Day is the one socially acceptable time for singletons to openly bemoan their relationship status. I myself have cried the solo blues on this dreaded day, cursing the cruel creator of "Single Awareness Day" (or SAD, as many years of familiarity have led me to abbreviate it). This February 14th, instead of lamenting over your relationship challenged circumstance; why not embrace your independent, spectacular self and be your own Valentine? Wear that red "S" on your sleeve with pride and be thankful you're escaping the tension and inevitable disappointment that can come along with most Valentine's Days. Here are five ways to celebrate your single self and be your own Valentine.

1. DO buy yourself a gift.
Last year you spent how much on a guy who didn't last through spring? This year as a single gal, be one of the 15% of US women who send themselves flowers on February 14th. Or get yourself a gift using the money that you would have wasted on a Valentine-because isn't sporting a shiny pair of patent leather pumps so much more gratifying than watching him open something he doesn't want? Spend your hard-earned money on someone who will appreciate a thoughtful gesture: you!

DON'T empty your bank account on self-improvement items.
You don't have a Valentine. So what? This is not the time to make yourself over like an OC housewife so that you can snag a date next year. Don't race to Barnes & Nobel and pick up the entire collection of dating how-to books and absolutely do NOT schedule an implant, nose job, or lypo appointment.

2. DO host a cocktail party for your single friends.
According to the US Census Bureau, 34% of people ages 25-34 are single. That means that at least three out of ten of your friends will be looking for something to do on Valentine's Day other than watch Sleepless in Seattle alone. Round up these singletons and host a "Single Celebratory" cocktail party. To spice it up, ask each friend to invite a steamy single guest. Just because you're celebrating yourself doesn't mean you're not allowed to get a little extra something while you're at it.

DON'T go overboard and drunk-dial your ex.
Your cocktail party is not an excuse to get wasted and mourn over past relationships. Drunk-dialing is never okay, especially on Valentine's Day. If you call him, it will just make you look sad and pathetic. Don't give him the satisfaction.

3. DO enjoy the unromantic.
Rather than subjecting yourself to a restaurant with couples galore and snobby waiters, go with some friends to a rustic neighborhood pub, order some buffalo wings and watch a sports game. Nothing says "Happy Non-Valentine's Day" like drinking a Corona and eating some greasy food with your girls.

DON'T enjoy the unromantic with your creepy next door neighbor.
Getting "rustic" does not mean resorting to your hairy neighbor. Maybe you don't have any plans for the evening, but that doesn't give you an excuse to find the closest thing with a pulse that is also alone for V-Day.

4. DO take some "me time."
While couples race around in panicked preparation, be glad you don't have to participate in the anxiety-ridden holiday. Take some time to do something relaxing for yourself. Go on that hike that you've always thought about or enjoy a candle-lit bath. And just because you're single doesn't mean you can't be pleasured.

DON'T take some "desperately searching for him time."
It's okay when taking your "me time" to reassess what qualities you're looking for in a man. It is not okay to make an impulsive decision to sign up for an online dating site. Not only will your frantic hunt for Mr. Right take away from your pampering, but the search will leave you with bloodshot eyes and a date with someone more desperate than you.

5. DO be a Valentine's Day Samaritan.
Even though you may be ready to celebrate your single self, other singletons may not be so enthusiastic. Send your grandma a note wishing her a happy Valentine's Day or bake some cookies for the lonely old man that lives down the hall. At least they'll get one good valentine.

DON'T be a Bitter Betty.
Just because you're not caught up in the Valentine's Day hype doesn't mean you have to be caught up in the anti-hype. Any sulking, moaning or spitting on overly-romantic couples will leave you alienated and lonely instead of single and proud.

Valentine's Day doesn't have to be a holiday reserved for lovers. This year, change "Single Awareness Day" to "Single Appreciation Day." Your enthusiasm will make couples everywhere SAD that they are missing out on such a fabulous holiday. Be Your own Valentine.


Flower Fact:www.corsinet.com/braincandy/valtrivia.html
Census Fact:factfinder.census.gov/servlet/BasicFactsServlet
www.census.gov/Press-Release/www/2003/cb03ff02.html


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