Can You Trust Your Friend Around Your Boyfriend?
10 signs your "friend" is not following friend/boyfriend etiquette.
- Libby Keatinge, BettyConfidential.com
Your girlfriends are supposed to be by your side and help you through your boyfriend highs and lows and give you advice. Unfortunately, not all girls play for team pink. When it comes time to meet your man, your friends need to be on their best behavior and know that their relationship with him is based on their relationship with you. Of course you want your boyfriend and your pals to get along, but getting too close for comfort is a big no-no. We talked to real women about what their friends did that showed they were breaking girl code. Here's 10 signs your pal is not practicing proper friend/boyfriend etiquette.
Read Help! My Best Friend Stole My Boyfriend!
1. Exchanging personal information the first time they meet: The first time you introduce your girlfriends to your boyfriend, there is no reason your friends need your boyfriend's number or email address. If there is a mutual interest or business opportunity between your friend and your boyfriend, a good friend will go through you. "My best friend Jackie is a real estate agent and when I introduced her to my boyfriend, who was looking for an apartment, she suggested that if he wanted her to show him some properties, I could call her to make arrangements. It really showed her class and loyalty that she did not give him her business card and went through me to make arrangements and respected the boundaries. She also sent another agent to show him around, so business and personal was not mixed. She is a class act!" Alyssa from Costa Mesa tells us.
2. Contacting him excessively through other social media: If you have introduced your friend to your boyfriend and you all have become friends, perhaps they will add each other on Facebook. If however, she begins sending him messages or writing on his wall often, it definitely breaks girlfriend code. "I introduced my friend to my boyfriend and the next few days she was sending him all these stupid tweets like: 'Where you at?' and 'Fun meeting you!' It was just so weird, pointless, and disloyal. I dropped her," Sasha from Los Angeles shares.
3. Showing your boyfriend photos of her in a bathing suit: There is no reason your friend needs to show your boyfriend photos of herself in a bikini. Scantily clad pictures are private and suggestive and your friend should know that and not show your man. "My boyfriend was asking my friend about her new phone and right in front of me she starts showing him all the sexy photos she took on it! It wasn't an accident. After one bikini shot popped up, she kept going through photos. Luckily my boyfriend said, 'Uh, thanks,' and walked away with me. It showed me he was a good one and she - not so much!" Krystal from Dallas shares.
4. Talking about sex: Talking about all the different positions she tried last night are for you and your friend to discuss, in private - not with your love interest present.
5. Trying to make plans with him and his friends without you: If your friend invites your boyfriend to a party or event that you are not invited to, it shows disloyalty and that she is not considering your feelings.
6. Calling for a favor or business without going through you: If a friend needs to do business or get a favor from your boyfriend, she should always go through you first. "My boyfriend owns an event space and my friend Lindsay wanted to have her birthday party there. I was out of town and she didn't even try to get in touch with me, she just called his office directly to talk to him and tried to book the party," Ava from New York shares.
7. If she runs into him and "forgets" to tell you she saw him or purposely omits information: A good girlfriend is always on your side and would always tell you if she runs into your man or has a conversation with him. "My friend ran into my boyfriend at a party he went to for a few minutes with his friend who took him there, and he told me a few days later. I thought it was odd that I had had a conversation with her the day after the party all about the cake, outfits, and who was there - but she failed to mention she ran into my boyfriend and even spoke to him. Just didn't sit well with me," Vanessa from Queens shares.
Read Is It OK to Date Your Best Friend's Ex?
8. If they were friends first: If they were friends first, the friend needs to establish her loyalty early on. "My girlfriend Angela introduced me to my now boyfriend, who she had been friends with for several years. She told me from the beginning that he and she were friends and she didn't want to engage in any "girl talk" that might make her feel uncomfortable: talking about guys I thought were cute or things my boyfriend did that annoy me," Jillian from Austin tells us. "It actually made me feel comfortable knowing the lines and boundaries she had established, but I knew I couldn't talk to her about him, which was probably the best for everybody." In this case, don't ditch her, but DO be careful what details you spill around her!
9. Talking badly about you when you are not there: Talking negatively about you when you are not around or sharing anything you and your friend have talked about about him in private is a big no-no. Your friend should always have your back and know that anything you have discussed with her about your relationship is not to be shared with him. If she is putting you down in front of your boyfriend - not cool!
10. Not telling you if she knows that he is cheating on you: If your friend knows your boyfriend is cheating on you, it is her job to let you know that, no matter how awkward it may be. Maybe you will react angrily and perhaps be suspicious, but when the truth comes out, you will know she is your friend for life.
Tell us: have you ever suspected your best friend of digging your boyfriend?
Libby Keatinge is a senior editor at BettyConfidential.
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