When it Comes to Flirting, Are We Still Kids at Heart?

Is this flirting or just plain bullying?

By James Lane for BounceBack.com

Remember when we were children and our parents would console us over being pushed on the playground or teased by a classmate? They would always give that same, trite answer: "They are only doing it because the like you." Well, now that we are grown up, have things changed? Or are we still teasing the ones we like?

I realized that some of us do not grow out of the bullying stage once we become an adult. Although it isn't called bullying now - it's called flirting. And flirting is a tool we all use in the dating game.

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If you really take a moment and look around, you will notice it everywhere you go. We make comments to someone, teasing them about their new haircut or outfit and giving them a hard time with comments consumed with sarcasm. The banter goes back and forth and an outsider would conclude that those two people despise each other, when in reality, it is just the opposite.

We may not be spending time in a sandbox or playground, but the actions are all the same. Life has become the new playground and our office is the sandbox. Everything is the same except we don't get a juice box and love lesson from our parents anymore while they kiss our bruises and mend our hearts. We are now alone to do all the deciphering.

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So, why are we still showing affection like this? Well, one reason is because the "bully" doesn't want to show his or her true feelings towards the other person, so they tease and make jokes at their expense to not come off vulnerable. Sometimes people don't like putting themselves out there, and this is a way to hide the shyness and possibilities of rejection by coming out and just sending a clear (albeit untrue) message that you hate this person. This is a definite method of adult flirting, and one that's abundant with singles. I don't know why or how, but it makes people that much more attracted to them. Don't we always want the ones who are bad and mean to us?

I believe that yes, some of us have grown up and know the right and correct way to attract the opposite sex with romance, dignity, and self-respect, while some of us haven't changed since recess. And some of us never will.

James Lane is an aspiring writer living in the heart of New York City. To read more from James, follow him on Twitter @JLTaffy4 and on his blog http://fatalabstraction.tumblr.com/

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