Kate and Wills: The Lifetime Movie

From the network that brought you "The Craigslist Killer" and every Tia and Tamara Mowry movie ever made, comes the true story of a prince and his future princess. The Lifetime movie machine is churning the royal romance of Prince William and Kate Middleton into made-for-tv butter. Unknown British actress Camilla Luddington has been cast as Kate and New Zealander Nico Evers Swindell will play Will o' Wales.

Here's a synopsis of the movie, set to air around the April 29th royal wedding date: "The film chronicles the history of William and Kate - from the moment the two students met at Scotland's prestigious University of St Andrews, through the ups and downs of their nine-year courtship complicated by social and Royal Family pressures, and intense global media attention surrounding their storybook nuptials."

That sounds way too accurate and paranoia-free for the Lifetime movies we know and love. Where are the deadly home invasions? The ex-boyfriend stalkers? The courageous battles against the healthcare system? Here's the revised synopsis, post-focus group, with a little more Lifetime flair: "It was the perfect wedding-until it all came crumbling down. Based on the true story of Kate Middleton, a young woman falls in love only to find that the man of her dreams isn't exactly who he seems. And when several jealous women, including a troubled pregnant teen, attempt to steal her identity, she must protect her family by fighting for her privacy and the man she loves."

It's kind of true, minus the pregnant jealous teen. Creative license, people. The movie's currently called "Will and Kate," but another suggestion for producers is: "A Wedding to Die For: The Kate Middleton Story".

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