LOVE HOROSCOPE: Seeing stars for the week of December 8th

aries (Mar. 21st-Apr. 20th)
Read the fine print before you sign the commitment contract.

taurus (Apr. 21st-May 20th)
Your insightful outlook will attract all sorts of interesting people. Suckers!

gemini (May 21st-June 21st)
This is a good week to interact with your luvva (as opposed to all those weeks when it's best to ignore them and take them for granted). Get out, pleasure seek, romance the stone--together. You know, go check into a cheap motel on the interstate for a couple of hours some night this week. (Check out this holiday dating advice for throwing your man into the party mix.)

cancer (June 22nd-July 22nd)
If you are subtle with your flirtations, you will attract someone very observant. And if you are obvious, you will turn off everyone and go home alone and sad. This week, get involved in organizations where you can meet large groups of people. Once there, try to attract someone very observant. Get the picture? (Three Foolproof Steps For Getting That Perfect First Kiss)

leo (July 23rd-Aug. 22nd)
Did you know that Americans have sex earlier, more often and with more partners than any other nation? It must be true 'cause we read it on the web. Bunch of horn-dogs, aren't we? This week, you're going to have to fight your roots and keep your legs crossed--the potential partners who come your way are not people you should be sleeping with, in our humble, non-expert opinion. Do whatever it takes to stay celibate for a week--adopt a fake British accent, wear a French beret, eat lots of Wienerschnitzel, etc. (And if you're not American, then stop screwing like one!)

What's the Longest You've Ever Gone Without Sex?

virgo (Aug. 23rd-Sept. 22nd)
Hunt for a mate in his/her natural habitat. If you're looking for a solid, dependable, upright citizen-type, don't cruise a dive bar five minutes before closing time. And if you're looking for a kinky, temporarily satisfying, emotionally devoid fling, don't sign up for your local church's singles getaway weekend. (Then again...)

libra (Sept. 23rd-Oct. 23rd)
If you open your mouth to confess your feelings this week, it just leaves you vulnerable to someone sticking their hand down your throat and ripping out your bloody, beating heart. Put a cork in it this week and spare yourself some pain.

Head here for the rest of our love horoscopes!

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