mom costumesYou know all of those slutty (insert character here) Halloween costumes you always hear about? Turns out that women actually wear those. In public. During the day. At elementary schools.
I know that as a parent and all things prim and proper that I should be against such displays. But seriously, some of these women were rocking it. You could see how good it made them feel. Who am I to deny someone the opportunity to feel good about themselves? I'm not that selfish.
More from The Stir: A Man's 12 Years Without Sex Makes Me Want to Cry
What I'm trying to get at is that I felt a little weird about checking out moms on the playground -- even if they were dressed as a slutty Pocahontas. Luckily, my wife was okay with it.
"Oh my God," she said. "Did you see that woman's boobs? Look at her boobs!"
"What?" I replied. "What boobs?" And then I made sure my wife saw me look directly at the boobs that had been in my peripheral vision for the previous five minutes.
"And look at Princess Leia!" she insisted. So I did.
Princess Leia was, at that moment, bent over to do whatever (talk to R2?), and it was quite obvious that she was wearing bright blue underwear, and not much of it.
More from The Stir: Should Dads Say 'Were Pregnant'?
So we looked at pretty women in revealing outfits because my wife understands that marriage does not mean other beautiful people have ceased to exist. To quote the obvious cliche, we're married, not dead -- although there was a really hot zombie in the parking lot.
While this was the holiday version of the game, it's not something restricted to playgrounds, because that would be creepy. My wife is always pointing out women that she thinks are worth my noticing. I try to return the favor.
More from The Stir: Father Beheads Daughter's Rapist: Hero or Monster?
"Look at that pirate," I said as we started walking home. The guy was no Johnny Depp, but he was trying real hard to make Jack Sparrow work. He deserved a shout.
Do you and your significant other point out attractive people to each other, or do you tend to frown on such things?
Image via byebye22/Flickr
More from The Stir: