Peeping Tom or Fart-Loving Pyro? You Decide

Brian Whitehead was recently on trial after putting an unidentifiable object up a woman's skirt.Brian Whitehead was recently on trial after putting an unidentifiable object up a woman's skirt.Some men have an excuse for everything-why they're always late, why they bailed on your date, why they forgot your anniversary.

But we'd bet that no excuse you've ever heard from a guy can top this one: A British guy named Brian Whitehead was recently on trial after he was spotted putting an unidentifiable object up a woman's skirt at a bar, which prosecutors thought might have been a camera.

By Natasha Burton

Not so, said Whitehead. He wasn't trying to take a photo of a woman's nether regions: He was-maybe-trying to light her fart on fire.

Yep, that's right. (We'll give you minute to collect yourself before giving you his full statement.)

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Apparently, Whitehead told police after he was accused via surveillance footage: "Maybe I was trying to light a fart. It could have been a joke. Maybe someone says 'I bet you a fiver if you light her fart.'"

Yeah. Maybe. Or maybe you're just a creepy perv who thinks everyone else is a total idiot. BTW: How would he know that she was going to fart? Does he have some kind of sixth sense?

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Needless to say, Whitehead will be sentenced later this month after being found guilty of "outraging public decency." Maybe he can spend his jail time, should he get any, amusing himself by lighting his own farts on fire, since he seems to be (theoretically) into that. Maybe.

Read more at Cosmopolitan.com!

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