"My Horribly Awkward Sexual Experience": Making Chili
A few brave readers have shared their awkward sexual experiences, including a guy who tried waaaaay too hard to please and a man who couldn't stop shushing.
Well, today, a reader tells us about her hilariously weird hookup...
Here's our reader's story...
The other night, I was feeling frisky and started kissing my sleeping boyfriend, hoping to get some action. I'm much more of a night owl than he is, and he's been working crazy hours lately plus going to school, which has really messed up his sleep schedule and our sex life. Finally he woke up, and we started messing around. After a little foreplay we started having sex, and he pulled me close and whispered in my ear:
"What kind of meat is this?"
I gasped, thinking this was some kind of dirty talk gone horribly awry, and asked him to repeat himself.
"What kind of meat is this?" he said again, dreamily.
By now I was mad. What the heck was this supposed to mean? But when I looked down at my boyfriend, I got my explanation: He was asleep.
I shook his shoulders to wake him up and told him what had happened. "Oh man," he said, "I was having a dream that we were making chili."
This was pretty horrifying at the time, but now we laugh about it, and have even replaced the phrase "making love" with "making chili," as in "Sweetie, I'm horny. Let's make some chili." And I definitely learned my lesson: Let sleeping boyfriends sleep!
Thanks for sharing! And dear readers, have you ever made out with a very sleepy guy? Has anyone ever fallen asleep on you? Have you ever fallen asleep on them? I mean, making out can be tiring!
P.S. Feeling bold? Read eleven more awkward sexual experiences...
Related: 10 Things He's Thinking When You're Naked!
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