Get Raw on the 1st Date

by Dating Coach Laurel House

First Date TipsWhat is it when it comes to making a great first impression? Well... there are no rules. When it comes to love, act how you feel, expose yourself, get real... and beyond that, get raw.


What is the point of going on a date and then not being yourself? Don't you want to get to know each other? See if you two are truly a fit? Figure out if you're interested in him and if he is interested in you- yes YOU, not the front or façade that you are putting up to protect yourself, not fully let him in, and simultaneously not give him the opportunity to honestly see who you are and what you're about. If you just smile, nod, and hand feed the top level information- like your name, occupation, college you went to, and maybe the fact that you have a dog, how are you going to standout, show that you are an interesting individual as opposed to just another pretty face with a surface personality?


1st dates are first impressions. They are also about feelings- do you feel a connection, do you feel attracted, do you feel like you might have potential. If you are acting, you aren't authentically feeling. The easiest way to feel that connection is by being yourself. Imagine that you have already been together for two months. How would you act then? If you're open, he will be open. If he is open, you are allowing for the possibility of a deeper connection, one rooted closer to your core as opposed to something surface and fleeting.

If you want to find that deep guttural love, the love that lasts, that hooks your heart and implants itself in your soul, you've got to screw the front, the façade, the protective layer, the walls, the hiding of the feelings, and be you… be raw, honest and real. No, not rude. If you don't like his shirt, you don't have to tell him that. You don't have to blurt out everything that comes to mind as if you have suddenly lost your filter. You also shouldn't vomit up your entire life, including all of the gory details. However, if a story comes up that includes an ex, it's ok to mention it and even him! If you have been married before, now might be the time to tell him that too. It's a fact isn't it? One that isn't going to go away and that is sadly more common than not these days. Put yourself on the table (not physically). This is me. This is who I really am. Like it? If not, that's ok, there truly are plenty of fish in the dating pond.

xx Laurel

Laurel HouseLaurel House is a Healthy Living and Dating Expert, 4x published Lifestyle Author, NASM Weight Loss Specialist, and nationally recognized Print and Online Magazine Writer covering travel, relationships, healthy food and fitness (New You, Women's Health, First for Women, Men's Journal, Yahoo! Shine, Elegant Bride, Fit, Spa, Fit Yoga, Playboy, etc). Beyond writing, she has appeared as an expert on television morning shows including E! News, Weekend TODAY, The Daily Buzz, Better.TV, Good DayLA, CBS, Fox, NBC, and ABC Morning News shows both locally and nationally, and her YouTube videos have received over 12 million views. Her 4th book "QuickieChick's Cheat Sheet to Life, Love, Food, Fitness, Fashion and Finance on a Less than Fabulous Budget" was published by St. Martin's in May 2012. She is currently writing her next book-"Screwing The (dating) Rules."