Relationship Lessons from Gossip Girl: Have You Ever Made a "List?"
I'm not talking a grocery list or a to-do list. I'm talking a how-many-people-I've-slept-with kind of list. Someone on Gossip Girl did last night, and (surprise!) it wasn't Serena or Blair. A bit of a spoiler alert here, so don't say I didn't warn you…
On last night's episode of Gossip Girl, Blair (Leighton Meester) is on a bad-girl rampage, Serena (Blake Lively) is on damage control and as for Serena's mother, Lily…well, she's making a sex list. (Yeah, you read that right.)
Do you know the 10 things he's thinking when he's having sex?
It all starts when Lily finds out that her pretty art dealer used to date Rufus, Lily's current boyfriend. Lily gets a little jealous, confronts Rufus and the whole thing escalates into each of them writing down exactly who they've slept with in years past, so they can swap lists.
Bad idea.
Turns out that despite being in an '80s rock band, Rufus wasn't bedding groupies. (Don't know how realistic that is, but it's a fictional TV show, so I'll go along with it.) Actually, Rufus's number is much lower than Lily's. So she lies about hers; he finds out and the whole thing blows up until Rufus resolves things by proving to Lily that he doesn't care how many men she slept with in her past-the only thing that really matters is who she is now. All together now: Awww…
Despite its cheesy delivery, there's a good lesson in therek: 1) Never make a list of past partners. 2) If you break rule #1 and you do make a list, promptly destroy it so your boyfriend never finds it in your bag while searching for tip money for the delivery guy. 3) The guy you're dating now is more important than the guy he used to be.
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I've never made a list. My friends and I have talked about the idea-I still remember this one girl in high school who kept a numbered log of hers-but ultimately, we decided that it'd be more of a challenge to make a list of how many guys we'd kissed than how many guys we'd slept with. (Actually knowing their names takes some of the fun out of the game anyway. But trying to recall that guy you made out with at that bar in July of 2004? Much more entertaining.)
But would I actually want to see the list of the guy I'm dating? Forget it. Yes, I'd be curious. Yes, you can give me a ballpark figure. But I don't need details, and I definitely don't need names. If I know names, I'll be tempted to look them up on Facebook. Hello, stalker!
Have you ever made a list? Was it just for yourself or did you actually show it to a guy? Would you want to see his? Did you watch last night's episode? What did you think?
Photo: Giovanni Rufino / The CW
P.S. Are you excited for the Gossip Girl spinoff that's all about the younger, wilder Lily van der Woodsen? If her list was any indication, it should be juicy! (I'm personally hoping for a cameo from Slash.)
Related: Sex Advice from Guys--What's the Best Thing a Woman's Ever Done for You in Bed?
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