How to Find a Sex Therapist and Your Orgasm

Wedding rings
Wedding rings

Orgasms are fantastic. If you don't climax during intercourse, a sex therapist can help you understand why. The decision to see a therapist doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. Your sexual health is important to your physical and emotional well-being. A good sex therapist will provide psychotherapy with an emphasis on making your sex life even sweeter.

When I mention I'm a sex writer, people often ask, "What does that mean?"

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Chefs and farmers share the same forte - food - though their occupations aren't identical.

Similarly, sexual health professions include physicians, licensed clinical social workers, journalists, educators, psychologists, sex therapists, and others. You've read fellow sex columnists Dr. Ruth Westheimer and Dan Savage's sex tips. If you saw Dr. Laura Berman on Oprah and wondered what it would be like to schedule a counseling session with a sex therapist, here are a few tips for finding the right one for you.

Check Credentials

It's tricky. Anyone can be a sex therapist. Although the field isn't federally regulated and many states do not require licenses, the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) has an online tool to locate a sex therapist certified through AASECT. The American Psychological Association also offers a directory of psychologists who treat sexual issues. Once you've settled on a therapist, be sure to inquire about educational background, academic degrees, professional training, and on-the-job experience.

Be Appropriate and Informed

For the love of God, never ask, "Do you have to sleep with a lot of people to become an expert in your field?" Indulging does not an expert make.

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Unearth Biases

The spectrum of sexual expression is wide, and it's been said the brain is the biggest sex organ. Gauge your therapist's ability to understand how your gender identity, race/ethnicity, religion, alternative sexuality, or other sociocultural factors may affect your sexual values -- if at all, depending on your circumstances.

Figure Out the Finances

Your insurance plan may cover sex therapy. Call your prospective therapist to ask if his or her services are reimbursable. If not, in some cases, the therapist may price services on a sliding fee scale based on your ability to pay. Regardless of the financial arrangements, remember you are paying for their help. Be honest during your sessions. Remember what is said in the privacy of their counsel should be confidential and will improve your overall health.

Image via Ernst Vikne/Flickr

Written by Twanna Hines on CafeMom's blog, The Stir.

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