Sex With My Roommate....What Should I Do Now??

My current roommate and I have been friends for quite a long time before our move. Then for reasons of convenience/finances we decided to find a place together. I was losing my old roommates and my friend wanted to find a new place and get a roommate. We both thought it was a good idea to live with someone we already know well. He was always flirty before, but it was kind of like a joke. He knew I was not into casual sex and do not sleep with "friends". So any flirts were rejected by me, but he understood this. He never asked me out on a true date over the three years we've known each other, but we hung out as friends on occasion. If we went out to eat, he usually paid for dinner, but I also paid on special occasions like his birthday or a new job, for example. He was typically generous as a friend. We never saw ourselves as dating and never crossed the line of friendship into physical stuff. That was mainly because I held the brakes, and expressed my feelings that sleeping with a friend was just not for me. I would not have sex with someone unless I was in a relationship.

Anyway, we have been living together for almost two months now. Things have gotten physical recently, because I've let go of some of my rules. My past relationships didn't work out, and I never enjoyed the long periods of self-imposed celibacy between relationships. My last relationship ended 7 months ago and I had been celibate since then, as is usual for me. My roommate is pretty attractive and he finds me attractive too, so things started with snuggling on the couch while watching TV, and over about three weeks it progressed to playing around in bed for a couple more weeks, and for the past week it's been actual sex a few times. The progression was as slow as it has been only because he said he was concerned that it would change our relationship of friends. After the first time we had sex, he told me the next day that he was afraid I might see the sex as meaning something different to me than to him. He said "I see you as a very good friend...period". I asked him what did he mean by "period"? I asked did that mean that he didn't see any potential of us becoming involved romantically and being more than friends. He said he wasn't speaking for the future, but that's all he saw us as right now, as good friends.

So, the lines are kind of blurred for me. We watch TV together, snuggle, have sex, but there are no definitions for the relationship. That's OK with me for now. But some of his behaviors are a bit off-putting. Even before we got physically involved, I viewed him as one of my good friends and didn't want to be the typical roommates who don't share anything in their lives except the bills. Since we're friends, I like doing things together at times, and that's worked out fine. I also believe in sharing as I would with a family member and not being so calculating about expenses at home. So, whenever I cook, I offer him what I've made, and tell him he's welcome to whatever groceries I've put in the fridge, whether ice-cream, juice, milk or anything else. When we first moved in together, he said he was on the same page with the groceries he bought as long as I didn't finish something off, like milk for example without replacing it in time for breakfast. I agree completely, as I would hate to wake up to cereal and no milk in the fridge. So, things have been smooth for the most part. Except recently, when it comes to grilling out. When I last bought some steaks and grilled out I offered him to have as much as he wanted. He only ate one steak, but knew he was welcome to more. Today he brought home some steaks and was planning on inviting his cousin over to watch basketball with him, so he asked me "I'm grilling out, do you have any meat you want to grill"? I said, "No, did you see any meat that I put in there?" I hadn't bought any in the last few days, so I thought it should have been obvious I had none. He had just finished telling me he bought about $30 worth of meat home from the grocery. He said he was grilling 2 steaks, one for him and one for his cousin, and the rest of the meat he wasn't planning on grilling until tomorrow. He was offering to grill meat for me if I had any. I found this very off-putting! I asked him why he was asking if I had any meat, "why the division over yours and mine"? I asked. He said, "I don't buy $30 worth of meat to just GIVE it away." As I told him I had none in the fridge at the moment, he said " If you want some I can open the package for tomorrow and put one on the grill for you." By this time, I was already feeling very disgusted by his lack of generosity, so I said I wasn't in the mood for any steak this afternoon. Even when we were still platonic friends, I wouldn't have found this sort of behavior very hospitable. I've had roommates before where everythihg was kept separate including groceries, and that's OK if that's how you want to live and it's agreed upon. When moving in with a close friend, I wanted to live in a more relaxed, sharing environment, where I share freely and my roommate does the same, just as I would if I were living with a family member. He agreed verbally at the start, but his actions don't seem to fit now. What makes it feel even worse is that we've had sex the last two nights in a row, which we enjoyed very much. I think it seems very selfish to tell the woman he's sleeping with the next day "I don't buy $30 of meat to just 'give' it away." For one thing there is no way I would eat $30 worth of meat, and secondly, why would he be so calculating when I exhibit a sharing attitude with him? For example, I bought him four gallons of ice-cream over the weekend. I ate a couple of bowls out of the last gallon he bought, so I told him I was replacing what I ate and he could have as much as he wanted of the rest of the ice cream I got. I think asking me if I had meat in the fridge and offering to grill it for me, while sharing his steaks with his cousin and not me, doesn't make sense at all. If he puts one of his steaks on the grill for me he sees it as 'giving it away', but he is not giving it away when sharing with his cousin? I feel that's pretty miserly towards me. And, it bothers me a great deal that the man I've chosen to give up my body to happens to be this selfish out of the bedroom. I feel so put off, that I don't think I will want to have sex with him anymore.

That raises a lot of questions for me. If I stop having sex with my roommate, I will definitely start dating again and looking for someone to have a real relationship with. However, projecting into the future, I think it would be very inconsiderate of my roommate's feelings to bring home a boyfriend and have sex in the room next door to my roommate. He's already told me upon moving in together, even before we got to being physical with one another, that it would make him uncomfortable to have to overhear me having sex with someone in the room next door. He felt this way even before we were sexually involved, so I know it would be emotionally intolerable for him to see me bring home a date and even hang out on the couch with my date watching TV. That's where he and I hang out...on the couch watching TV! So, the living situation is pretty messed up in my opinion. I have no desire to move again!!! The last move into this place has been the toughtest move of my life. So many things went wrong with this move, that I almost vowed to myself to never move again! Well, not for a very, very, very long time. I think my roommate can be a pretty bad jerk sometimes, so I don't think he would make a good boyfriend, and I can't see us as becoming boyfriend and girlfriend anymore, although I had been considering that as a potential outcome of our interaction. I think the right thing to do now is to stop sleeping with him, but it makes it very difficult for me to date as long as we continue living together. I welcome all opinions and advice!